They've done battle with aliens and demigods. They've faced off against one another and often themselves. It's tough out there for a superhero. But, which ones will meet their match when facing a killer like coronavirus? It got us to thinking.
For the sake of time and space, we'll stick with the main film members of the Avengers and the Justice League from the respective Marvel and DC universes. We could sit here all day and break down every X-Man and every Guardian of the Galaxy, but this seemed like a more reasonable approach. Besides, don't you want to know if we think Bruce Wayne bites the dust?
Thor, Hulk, Captain Marvel, Superman, Wonder Woman, Vision, Cyborg, Aquaman
Thor and Wonder Woman are demigods. Captain Marvel is infused with alien energy and Superman IS an alien. Vision and Cyborg are more machine than human. Aquaman is from freaking Atlantis and he's basically a fish. And as for Hulk, well, he can't even kill himself.
None of them are getting a virus.
Probably Immune or Damn Near
Spiderman, Captain America, Black Panther, Flash
Spiderman and Flash have super healing abilities as does Captain America, thanks to those crazy steroids he got back in the '40s. Black Panther has the healing tools of Wakanda, which appear to be unrivaled and pretty much miraculous. While it is possible a rogue virus could infect them and cause some serious issues, we rate this highly unlikely.
They survive regardless.
Not Really Sure, But Probably Safe
Scarlet Witch, Dr. Strange
Honestly, we don't know if Wanda can get sick. She's human. Lord knows she's mopey and emotional. Those are their own kinds of illnesses. But, she has that mind-bending voodoo stuff and who is to say just what she can do? For all we know, she could send that red light inside her own body and rip the virus out by those nasty looking suction cups. Ditto Dr. Strange. He's a doctor and he can do actual magic, you guys, magic!
Our money is on SW and Dr. S.
Vulnerable, But They Have Protection
Iron Man, War Machine, Batman, Ant Man, The Wasp
Iron Man and War Machine could live for a while in their hermetically sealed metal coffins for quite a while. They basically fly around in bad ass hazmat suits. Ant Man and The Wasp have Hank Pym, one of the most brilliant minds in the world, and the ability to shrink down to the size of a virus and zap it if need be, even if going subatomic is risky. Batman is a tossup. That guy is always beat to hell, so his immune system cannot be in tip top shape. Still, he has so many gadgets, we assume one of them includes viral antibodies. And let's be honest, Bruce's real super power is being rich, which can buy you pretty much anything including miracle health.
This crew could get sick, but they probably won't.
They Gonna Die
Black Widow, Hawkeye, Falcon
Falcon (or should we say, Captain?) is just a dude with some cool metal wings. We're not even sure how he became an Avenger. Hawkeye is basically a farmer with dead aim. It comes in handy when you need to hit a squirrel with a BB from 200 feet because he keeps digging in your garden and you'd rather scare then harm the little fella. But, when it comes to getting sick, that's worthless. We love the Widow, and she is one ass-kicking assassin, but all her ninja skills got nothing on corona.
Sorry, Clint, Sam and Natasha, you aren't going to make it.
Keep the Houston Press Free... Since we started the Houston Press, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Houston, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Houston with no paywalls.