Film and TV

Dallas: "He's a Man. Worse, He's a *Ewing* Man."

What the? Bobby and Christopher own Southfork's mineral rights? Marta has sworn vendetta against Elena? John Ross threatened by Venezuelans? Rebecca's pregnant? Where the hell have I been?

Oh, right...vacation. Thanks to the lovely and talented Abby Koenig for taking the reins (ranch pun) last week. We're ticking away the final few episodes of this season, and the denizens of Big D are each bracing in their own way for the coming chaos. J.R. continues to jockey for control of Southfork, a newly pregnant Rebecca attempts to reconcile with Christopher, while Bobby and Ann deal with the fallout from his attack on Harris Ryland.

As for John Ross, I believe Pvt. Gomer Pyle in Full Metal Jacket said it best, "I *am* in a world of shit."

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Peter Vonder Haar writes movie reviews for the Houston Press and the occasional book. The first three novels in the "Clarke & Clarke Mysteries" - Lucky Town, Point Blank, and Empty Sky - are out now.
Contact: Pete Vonder Haar