The teaser trailer for She-Ra came out recently. The upcoming Netflix series is just the latest in pop culture reboots that has got geekdom acting like entitled douchebags once again. I’ve written before about how making media consumption a core part of your identity turns people in strange monsters, and that article gets more and more true every year.
For the life of me, I cannot understand why something like a cartoon remake engenders rage in a healthy adult. It does, though. Some of the things people say…
5. The Art is Too Different
This is almost a legitimate complaint, but it’s lousy with stunted thinking. The new She-Ra looks very different from how she appeared in the original cartoon. ALL cartoons look different now, though. Styles change. The new She-Ra looks like a cross between Steven Universe and How to Train Your Dragon, meaning it appears contemporary instead of dated. The same thing goes for the latest incarnation of the Ninja Turtles.
It’s okay to not like modern trends in animation. I personally detest everything that looks like Adventure Time. However, hating a style on its merits and hating it simply because it doesn’t match what eight-year-old you remembers are two very different things. Expecting something like She-Ra to fly against all current animation style trends at the moment to appease middle-age people is ridiculous. Speaking of middle-age…
4. You’re Betraying Fans
Here’s an honest question: at what point does something you liked as a kid no longer belong to you? You ever see Drop Dead Fred? There comes a time when childhood fantasies should be beloved memories instead of active fandoms.
That’s not to say you can’t love cartoons as an adult. I’m counting down the days to the return of Agretsuko (and yes, nerds, I’m going to watch Voltron eventually).
Netflix didn’t make She-Ra for “the fans.” Odds are most people calling themselves that haven’t spent a dollar on She-Ra in twenty years. They’re making it because streaming cartoons on Netflix is what a whole lot of parents, including myself, use to not go insane when the kids are at home. Fandom is like a membership. You have to keep up your dues or you don’t get to say what happens to the future. Simply having liked something once doesn’t make you the authority, and no one is going to consult you before they move on with their big-budget animation project.
3. They’re Bending to the PC Police
Even though I have nothing for contempt for people who squeal about a female Doctor Who or a black Spider-man, I can at least see where they are coming from. Fear of change is an ancient human emotion and the basis of some of the eternal tales of mythology. I get that.
But She-Ra? The Princess of Power? In the name of Captain Crunch, are y’all cereal right now? The original existed only to appeal to the female side of the action figure market. Princess Adora is literally a gaslighted woman who overcomes her male oppressor to save her world. That is her entire premise. The sword and sorcery is just to sell action figures. I’m starting to think that what a lot of dudes (and it is mostly dudes saying these things) remember is how the drawing of the pretty lady gave them their first boner.
2. On Boners
The hatred of the new art is weirdly fixated on the apparent sexlessness of Adora. Far be it from me to deny the red-hot eroticism 1980s Filmation technology, but just because the new outfit is more Sailor Moon than Taarna the Taarakian doesn’t mean you can’t tell she’s a girl. Women do exist even if they don’t have bulging knockers.
I pointed this out when there was the non-scandal in gaming over Tifa’s boobs in the upcoming Final Fantasy VII remake. Gross “fans” rallied to a completely imaginary cause of wanting to preserve the breasts of a fictional character. As if people haven’t been drawing porn of Adora for the last thirty years. Why people can’t separate their dick needs from mainstream entertainment, especially when it comes to children’s shows, is baffling and gross.
1. I Guess Boys Don’t Have a Role Model
Male protagonists still dominate the vast majority of all media. Period. If you argue with that I can’t help you.
Besides that though, I think about what Jodie Whittaker said about being the new Doctor Who. She felt that she could be a role model for boys and girls, and the very fact that so many people see a female-centric show and decide that it boys can’t respect it because of that proves the need for exactly that. Maybe if a few boys in the ‘80s paid attention to what the Princess of Power was doing when they were kids instead of what she was wearing, we wouldn’t be in the political dumpster fire we’re in now.
She-Ra premiers on Netflix on November 16.
This article appears in Jan 1 – Dec 31, 2018.
