Design

Five Capcom Characters You Won't See in Marvel Vs. Capcom 3

Last time we explored the Marvel characters simply too lame to be included in the upcoming Marvel Vs. Capcom 3. This time, we'll take on the Capcom side of the equation, but with a slight difference. You see, most of the characters mentioned here are actually pretty damn awesome. It's just that for one reason or another they will never see the light of day again.

You'll note that the list is heavy on bad guys, and there are two reasons for that. One, the Capcom side is short on antagonists. Only Resident Evil's Albert Wesker has been revealed in Capcom's MVC3 lineup, while Marvel is sporting big guns like Doctor Doom, MODOK, and Dormammu. Two, the trailers and press release hinted of one more huge threat that'll be the final big baddie at the end of the game. Here's hoping it's one of the following.


THE ORC KING FROM KING OF DRAGONS

Why it's never going to happen: No one played King of Dragons on the SNES. No one except people who really wanted to try Dungeons and Dragons but didn't have anyone to be that nerdy with. For instance: Its interface was clumsy; its main characters didn't even have names; and they didn't even bother to call the end boss anything but Evil Wizard and Red Dragon. Still, it was a fun little adventure game, and its very first boss was the fat, loud, rude, chain-swinging Orc King.

Why it should! Ever since Lord of the Rings people have wanted to find a way to get into the mindset of the gutter race of the Orcs. Maybe underneath that pig-like visage beats the hearts of noble warriors! Or maybe they're the equivalent to porcine soccer hooligans. Who can say? One thing we know for sure is that MVC3 is currently lacking a good fat guy to laugh and beat people with chains. It's like NASCAR without chewing tobacco!

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Jef Rouner (not cis, he/him) is a contributing writer who covers politics, pop culture, social justice, video games, and online behavior. He is often a professional annoyance to the ignorant and hurtful.
Contact: Jef Rouner