Five Marvel Characters You Won't See in Marvel Vs. Capcom 3

Marvel vs Capcom 3 is a game that we have been highly anticipating for a decade, and it's going to be here in less than two weeks! We're not sure if we'd sell our first born to get our hands on a copy right now, but we might be open to some sort of rental program...

For the few of you who grew up in some weird religious cult that abhors violence and the indescribable high that comes from controlling the Incredible Hulk as he beats up Street Fighter characters, the MVC series is what happens when someone just says "Fuck it!" and throws a random assortment of comic book heroes and villains against pretty much whoever Capcom had laying around in their warehouse and lets them fight it out. At first, the series mostly focused on well-known flagship characters from both universes, but both sides have branched out over the years to try and include some interesting and obscure figures.

They're still releasing the names of all the fighters, but next is a list of five "superhumans" from the Marvel universe that we can be fairly certain are not going to be in the finished product because...well, they're lame.


Too lame to be included because: Squirrel Girl was created by legendary comic book character creator Steve Ditko, and no one has ever been sure if he was joking or not. The character was actually introduced to be Iron Man's sidekick. Her powers are squirrel based: She has claws, a prehensile tail, is amazingly agile, but most importantly she can communicate with the squirrels. Don't knock this skill! Using an enormous squirrel army she has been able to beat villains like Doctor Doom and MODOK, both of whom are scheduled to make an appearance in MVC3.

Did we mention that Squirrel Girl rewards her furry friends with an endless supply of acorns that she keeps in sacks on her belt? Well she does, and before you even think about trying to be funny, yes, she calls them her "nut sacks."

Why she should be included anyway: As mentioned before, she's pretty much taken down some of the most powerful villains in the Marvel universe single handedly, including Thanos, who was the final boss of Capcom's Marvel Super Heroes fighting game. Tell us you've never dreamed of summoning a horde of squirrels to defeat your enemies! It's like a Disney version of Willard!

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Jef Rouner (not cis, he/him) is a contributing writer who covers politics, pop culture, social justice, video games, and online behavior. He is often a professional annoyance to the ignorant and hurtful.
Contact: Jef Rouner