Five More Real-Life Candidates For Mortal Kombat

Honestly, when we penned part one of this article we thought we'd have to struggle to come up with five people who would fit in the weird and violent world that is Mortal Kombat. Just a few hours on the internet though has shown us that the world is so chocked-full of bizarre badassery that we're surprised every day doesn't end with a battle to the death.

If the makers of Mortal Kombat are reading this, you now have a 10-person roster for a fighting game that will eclipse all others. Please mail the check c/o Houston Press along with the naked pictures of Mileena we know for a fact you have.

Speaking of which...

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Jef Rouner is a contributing writer who covers politics, pop culture, social justice, video games, and online behavior. He is often a professional annoyance to the ignorant and hurtful.
Contact: Jef Rouner