Hollywood Couples Who Phone It In

The biggest news to hit the Internet - Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin made out during a recent Cold Play concert, and then they spent the evening canoodling at a Miami restaurant. According to certain sources, "She was all over him!" This is huge news considering that the two are married...to each other.

As commonplace as this news should be -- husband kisses wife -- it made headlines on various entertainment Web sites last week and continues to do so even a week later. Why is it such a big deal the Gwyn and her man showed some affection toward each other? Maybe the Interwebs are so excited about this particular couple's PDA because, up until this week, they could have been legally separated and no one would be the wiser. They are never seen together, rarely discuss one another, and has Martin even written any Cold Play songs in dedication to his blond babe? "Yellow" came out before the two were even dating.

Given the recent divorce of one Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise, another couple that you would never guess shared a bed, it's no wonder the gossip sites are excited about Martin and Paltrow actually hanging out together. Up until now, this couple seemed to be phoning it in.

Martin and Paltrow aren't the first Hollywood couple to act like strangers and they certainly won't be the last.

Kelly Ripa and Mark Consuelos

Ripa and Consuelos have been married for almost 16 years and they have three children together. Ripa describes the two as the happiest, most amazing couple to ever grace the world with their presence. And at any given moment, Ripa finds a reason to talk about how they keep their sex life so spicy, to which her husband just laughs embarrassingly. Why does she need to relay this information? Some psychologists assert that people who talk things up a lot do so because of lack of substance. Maybe they do the deed every night, maybe they haven't done it since their third child was born; either way, kissing and telling makes it look like there's not much there to tell.

Nicole Richie and Joel Madden

Did you even know they were still together? Me neither. I thought they got divorced years ago, but then I also often mix them up with Ashley Simpson and her husband, who actually are divorced.

Victoria and David Beckham

If I were to take a guess, I would say that these two have never had a conversation about anything other than fashion, his and her perfume, abs, the Spice Girls or hair product in their entire married lives. For some reason, though, they keep tossing out babies. Maybe they are one of those couples that never speak, they just do it a lot.

John Travolta and Kelly Preston

I will not speculate on the recent and not so recent accusations made toward John Travolta. It's difficult to not have an opinion on it one way or another, especially given the number of times this guy has been accused of "flirting with disaster," so to speak. Even if Preston is a traditional "stand by your man" type of gal, standing by your man while he is potentially standing by another man must weigh heavy on her heart. How could it not, yet Preston's smile never wavers; her arm is always firmly strung through Travolta's arm and she appears to be the most content wife in the known universe. That's just too weird to be true.

Any Bachelor and Any Girl He Gives a Rose to and Eventually Marries Briefly

You are not fooling anyone. There is no one that could possibly believe that you two people, who have just met on a fake reality television show, have instantly fallen for each other and will live happily ever after. The world doesn't work like that. If it did work that way, we'd all be married to the first guy that we met on OKCupid that convinced us over e-mail he was "looking for a relationship." We all know how that ended up, nothing short of a horrible, hungover morning of shameful regret and no roses.

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