Newsflash: Apparently People Think the Perry Voodoo Dolls Are Really Magic

So last week I ran an article on Michelle Sinched and her project of selling voodoo dolls of Governor Rick Perry and donating proceeds to Planned Parenthood in protest of his new abortion initiatives. It was a quick bit of journalism that was more of a celebration of the quirkiness of one of my favorite local artists than anything else. I had no idea that when I penned it the next morning it would spread everywhere from Huffington Post to Glenn Beck's The Blaze.

Which is fine, of course. It's always gratifying as a reporter to see your work make its way into national news. Not bad for ten minutes worth of a Facebook PM conversation. And hey, the more people know that you can get a quality corset in Houston in addition to a handmade fetish of Rick Perry the more I feel I've contributed to the diversity of the city.

Then I read the comments and I discovered something I did not know... there are people who believe in black magic to the freakin' bone. I mean, they honestly see what is pretty obviously a cross between a joke and protest art and instead interpret it as actual maleficarum. Look, I believe plenty of wacky things. Two separate editors have questioned whether I know Doctor Who is just a TV show, but if you think that a few dolls made from leftover sewing project scraps actually constitutes an occult act then you are out to lunch.

With plenty of folks to eat with. Check it out.

Flashback Corset Maker Crafts Perry Anti-Abortion Voodoo Dolls to Benefit Planned Parenthood

This is going to surprise the hell out of you, but most of the people who commented on the story on The Blaze were actually pretty sane. Plenty of people who had strong feelings against abortion, sure, but not as many nuts who thought that Sinched was selling Death Eater starter kits.

Then there's folks like this... the only way a voodoo doll can backfire on you is if you accidentally stab yourself with a pin. Or, I guess, if you blew the money for your psyche meds on a doll.

You hear that girls? Corsets equal sluts, sluts equal abortions, and you should buy a doll to keep that particular hump train a-rolling on the tracks.Flashback The Path to Being Pro-Life: What It Really Means

Did I mention that Info Wars picked up the story as well? Well they did, and they handled it with all the finesse you could expect.

This latest effort to inject black magic into the abortion debate harkens back to eerie demonic chants heard earlier this month on the Texas Senate floor.

On July 2, a collective shudder was felt throughout the nation as it was revealed that pro-choice activists were chanting "hail Satan" at one of the rallies after previous abortion legislation was defeated.

Where were you when you felt the shudder sparked by a few pissed of protesters mocking folks singing "Amazing Grace" at them? Clearly the devil is hard at work doing what he does best... taking the piss out of people who believe in him.

It's been a while since I read it, but I'm pretty sure there's punctuation in the Bible.

Then there was our dear old Houston Chronicle, whose readers made a point of reminding me why I don't write political stories for that esteemed publication. There was at least a lot less "Da debil's gonna get you," but it was shorn up with some good old-fashioned racism to make up for it. The commenter went on to state that Katrina dumped all the liberals in Texas, and that's the reason for our increasingly blue populace.

By the by, another leitmotif in the reactions was that if there was a Barack Obama voodoo doll the makers would be rounded up for hate crimes and sodomized with a drone strike. I sure hope the people here, here, here, here, and here are keeping an eye out.

I'll leave you with this last exchange from the Huffington Post. Ladies? If someone calls you "devil woman," please know that you've won forever.

Jef With One F is a recovering rock star taking it one day at a time. You can read about his adventures in The Bible Spelled Backwards or connect with him on Facebook.

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