Person Of Interest: "Sorry Girls, My System Only Runs On Diesel"

You know what was a great show? Charlie's Angels. Honestly, I have no clear recollection if it was good or not. All I know is the very first carbonating of my hormones can be traced to two women: Lynda Carter in Wonder Woman, and Jaclyn Smith in Angels.

It should be obvious why I'm bringing this up. This week, POI decided to utilize the not insignificant cheesecake factor of the show -- however briefly -- to beef up what was a pretty sparse episode. I have no complaints.

I missed that Root (Amy Acker) is now listed as an "analog interface" in the opening credits (Shaw is "presumed dead"). Somebody do a mash-up of all the changes in those since season one. I'll pay you in Dos Equis.

Ian Murphy, your Number of the Week, is a successful entrepreneur who may be hunting women online (or may be trying to protect them, which seems equally likely). Shaw (Sarah Shahi) tails him from one date to another while Reese (Jim Caveziel) cases his apartment and finds honest-to-God "binders full of women." We have serious Lechter potential here, people.

Oh, and the Special Counsel's old buddy Hersh (Boris McGiver) is working his way through what looks like a list of all the mental institutions in the Northeast in order to find Root. That sounds exhausting. In any event, he better hurry, since she's told her shrink she's flying the cuckoo's nest soon. In response, the doctor rubs his eyes under his glasses, which is the psychiatric equivalent of grabbing someone by the lapels.

Reese's scheme to trap Murphy consists of getting Shaw, Carter (Taraji P. Henson), and Zoe Morgan (Paige Turco) to squeeze into minidresses and hit a club Murphy is known to frequent. As plans go, it's not quite "Get her!", but it does have a certain bodacious simplicity. And oh, the gams.

Murphy homes in on Carter, and we're obviously supposed to think he's a New World Bundy, but I'm going to bet he's a actually looking for help to find the "real killers" of someone, such as an innocent man like O.J. Simpson would. Carter and Shaw end up foiling what appears to be an attempt on Murphy's life. Exposition time!

Meh. The story is actually much less exciting than the previously mentioned scenarios. Murphy knocked up some rich guy's daughter, and while he was told she had an abortion, there's actually a son involved. Now said rich guy wants Murphy dead so he can groom his grandson as his heir in supervillainy. Makes sense, because dealing with this stuff in an aboveboard fashion would be too "real world."

The cascading series of events that leads to Murphy kidnapping his own son is both ridiculous and hilarious enough that I won't get into it here. Root lets Hersh live (why do people keep doing that?), probably for some nefarious future purpose. Don't forget, Hersh is Shaw's mentor, so that's sure to be a factor.

Next week: Bear finally gets into the act.

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