Pop Rocks

Pop Rocks: Bill And Ted? Or Vince And Ari?

Or maybe even "Okay News/Bad News," depending on your feelings regarding San Dimas High School football.

That's right, the rumors you've heard may or may not be true in that a third Bill and Ted movie might or might not be getting made:

Keanu Reeves has been talking about the mad dream that is Bill & Ted 3 for quite some time now. Because the world is an insane place where dreams very occasionally come true, a screenplay for such a project might actually exist. Co-star Alex Winter (a.k.a. Bill S. Preston, Esq.) tweeted last night, "Just got the script. And now to read..." (Earlier this month, Reeves indicated to MTV that writers Ed Solomon and Chris Matheson were "six weeks away" from a draft.)

That's an awful lot of ambiguity, even when talking about a couple actors not actually, you know, committed or signed to anything. Whatever your opinion of Wyld Stallyns or the Grim Reaper's buttocks, news of Bill and Ted 3 must necessarily sound like the 21st century Citizen Kane when compared to another (extremely iffy) recent cinema rumor. Namely, the possibility of an Entourage movie.

Could we do more? Absolutely. But I think that's the perfect way to end it. And people's biggest complaint with me is that there needs to be more show -- it's not long enough. So I think that we're set up pretty nicely for a movie.

We can take anything Jeremy Piven says with a rather massive grain of salt, I think. A throwaway line in an interview is hardly a pre-production deal, especially from a guy who bowed out of a Broadway gig for "mercury poisoning."

Do either of these potential films sound appealing? As far as another go-around with Bill S. Preston, Esq. and Ted Theodore Logan is concerned, I say sure, especially if the filmmakers continue the series' journey into weirdness. Bogus Journey was a much better movie than Excellent Adventure for a number of reasons, not limited to the depiction of Hell, William Sadler's excellent (no pun intended) Reaper, and - of course - Primus.

It would have to be a sequel, with Reeves and Winter reprising their roles in whatever weird capacity was necessary (a remake with Shia LaBoeuf and Michael Cera just isn't going to cut it). Sadler would likely be back (there won't be much call for him in a sequel to The Mist, just saying), and while it's obviously not possible for the actual George Carlin to return as Rufus...there have been some great advances in CGI during the last decade,

Oh shut up. He wouldn't mind.

But while Bill and Ted have a ready-made audience that would likely turn out for nostalgia, if nothing else. I don't know if you can say the same for Entourage.

HBO's track record with original series is hardly spotless. For every Sopranos or The Wire there's a been a Mind of the Married Man or Dane Cook's Tourgasm. I sat through the first season and a half or so of Entourage before tiring of watching the same show every week. And I think the only reason there's any traction to this movie rumor is because Mark Wahlberg wants to punish humanity for not giving him an acting nomination for The Fighter.

Admittedly, most successful shows follow some sort of pattern in order to draw people in, Entourage's was just more annoying that most. The repetitiveness of each season - Vince gets another big shot, then possibly screws it up (he'll need E to help him out), Ari yells "fuck" a lot and abuses Lloyd, who pouts, Turtle smokes weed, Drama provides comedy relief ("Is there a part for me?"), and then everything works out, though we're left, once again, wondering if Vince will ever truly be happy with his success.

Put that way, you could make a whole series of movies. They'd be like the James Bond flicks; the plot would be minor variation of the same theme, they'd just switch up the celebrity cameos depending on whose Q rating was peaking that year.

I read somewhere the show is how most 20-something males in flyover country view L.A. And the thing is, it's completely accurate. Los Angeles is a neverending parade of hot cars and hot ass...provided you're a fabulously wealthy young actor. But in the end, I just don't see Vince and the boys having the kind of following as Bill and Ted. Entourage is pretty popular among young guys, and watching a bunch of prvilieged d-bags go to parties and play video games never gets old. But come on: Wyld Stallyns saved the planet.

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Peter Vonder Haar writes movie reviews for the Houston Press and the occasional book. The first three novels in the "Clarke & Clarke Mysteries" - Lucky Town, Point Blank, and Empty Sky - are out now.
Contact: Pete Vonder Haar