Random Ephemera

The 4 Most Bizarre Theme Cruises This Year

I work a lot. Six days a week at the day job and till midnight every night crafting the finest pop culture reports and penis jokes that the Houston Press will buy off of my guttersnipe form. It's a good life, trust me, because no one will ever look back over his existence from his deathbed and say, "Boy, I'm sure glad I spent all that time finding 100 gold skulltulas in Ocarina of Time." It's best to dig in and accomplish something with your time on Earth.

That being said, we all need a break or we just end up donning a costume and robbing a bank from our murder blimp... you know, as an example. Americans work a lot. According to a 2008 ranking by the Organization for Economic Co-operation and Development, we're the ninth hardest working nation in the world with an average of 1,797 hours spent at paid employment a year (Korea ranked number 1 with 2,357 hours). If you want to maintain your sanity, you'd better take some time off. Well, why not a cruise?

I've been trying to find time and funds for years now to go on the annual Gothic Cruise. Several of my friends have gone, and all agree that it's a nonstop drunken blast featuring great music and everything your spooky little heart might desire. While you may think that a gothic cruise sounds bizarre, you have no idea what incredibly perplexing packages are sold to discerning consumers looking to get away.

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Jef Rouner (not cis, he/him) is a contributing writer who covers politics, pop culture, social justice, video games, and online behavior. He is often a professional annoyance to the ignorant and hurtful.
Contact: Jef Rouner