You might not see comedian Steve Harvey's toothy grin as often as you did a few years back when he was hosting It's Showtime at the Apollo and starring in The Steve Harvey Show, but that doesn't mean he's lost a step. The man's still got it goin' on, and he's bringing his stand-up routine to town to prove it. "I talk about my life," he once told an interviewer. "I don't fabricate comedy." He must have a pretty funny life, 'cuz he's still the king. Rushion McDonald and Tommy Miles will open for him at 8 p.m. H-Town's Arena Theater, 7326 Southwest Freeway. For information, call 713-988-1020. $60.
Friday, January 30
If you're partying this weekend at the Super Bash, you're obviously a big fan of bands that manage to strike a chord with the lowest common denominator in us all. Rock on. While you're at the party, be sure to take a quick break from all that pop rockin' and head over to the Gillette "Game Face Grooming Station," where you can get all riled up for the big game. The whole booth is clearly just a shameless attempt to sell a few razors, but that doesn't mean you can't have fun with it. NFL cheerleaders (yeah, that's right) will be on hand to provide moral support as barbers shave participants' faces (with a Gillette razor, perhaps?) in preparation for a face-painting extravaganza -- a manly face-painting extravaganza, that is. You can also register your freshly shaven mug for the "Best Game Face a Man Can Get" contest. If yours truly is the best game face a man can get, your dashing good looks will appear in an upcoming issue of Sports Illustrated. If yours isn't the best, then you'll get the consolation prize: a lifetime supply of free junk mail. 2 p.m. to 6 p.m. today. Noon to 6 p.m. Saturday, January 31. Gillette Tent inside the Coors Light Super Bash, in the two city blocks bounded by Austin, La Branch, Prairie and Capitol. For information, call 212-601-8237 or visit www.gillette.com. Free, once you've paid $20 to get into the Super Bash.
We've had some good times over the last few months picking on The Main Event downtown. Call us cynics, but we just couldn't understand how the addition of a few jugglers, magicians and street musicians was supposed to jazz up the vibe on Main Street. We weren't even quite sure what was supposedly wrong with the scene in the first place. But none of that will matter tonight. The strip is sure to be packed when thousands upon thousands of out-of-towners hit the street in search of some rowdiness. We don't suggest you bother paying any of the trumped-up cover charges at most of the bars on the strip, unless you're really in the mood to take out a second mortgage on your house. Just walk around the crowd, soak in the excitement (it's finally here, you know) and thank God that all these fools will be gone soon. Main Street between Congress and Capitol.
Sunday, February 1
The Super Bowl. There. We said it. Pretty much everyone who's anyone will be doing something related to the big game, which is exactly why hipster types will be congregating at places like the Aurora Picture Show -- or anywhere else they can find where no one gives a damn about all the football fuss. Tonight the Aurora will be screening a selection of films from the wacky files of Paul and Elizabeth Nelson, the curators of Cinema Bomar. So what can we expect from the odd couple in their latest installation? A quote from the Aurora's Web site says it all: "a screening of crypto-religious, futuristic, Eastern European, women's liberation, V.D., educational films that will teach you all about taking pride in your work while developing a new appreciation for the toes of prepubescent girls and chicken boiled in vinegar." We're not sure exactly how to feel about that, but it sounds oddly appealing. 3 p.m. today. 8 p.m. Saturday, January 31. 800 Aurora. For information, call 713-868-2101 or visit www.aurorapictureshow.org. $5.
Monday, Febraury 2
After all the hype surrounding Super This and Super That, we bet you forgot that today is Groundhog Day. No big surprise, really. After all, it's a holiday that means very little in a place where we don't even have real winters. Maybe that's why the folks at the Houston Zoo have ditched the forecasts of Punxsutawney Phil altogether and come up with their own weather animal, Elizabeth the Guinea Hog. Instead of looking for her shadow, she'll make her weather prediction by selecting between a beach ball and a snowball. We'll let you figure out for yourself what each ball is supposed to represent. She'll then interpret her prognostication by dipping her snout in paint and rubbing it on a canvas. If she knew how to spell, she could just write out her answer: "DAMN HOT." 10 a.m. Houston Zoo, 1513 North MacGregor. For information, call 713-533-6500 or visit www.houstonzoo.com. $7 for adults; $3 for kids.
Tuesday, February 3
With last weekend's brouhaha becoming a distant memory, you're probably having trouble readjusting to the life of a working stiff. Fuck it. Yank off those work duds, grab a drum and head over to Super Happy Fun Land for an open drum circle. After a couple of hours of beating away your frustrations (on a drum, you sick bastard), you just might be able to face the rest of the workweek. Or you could discover your inner yawp and realize you're never going to go back to the cube-farm again. Would that be such a bad thing? 7 p.m. 2610 Ashland. For information, call 713-880-2100 or visit www.superhappyfunland.com. Free.
Wednesday, February 4
Maybe you didn't take our advice yesterday and now you're sitting at the office, full of stress and disillusionment. It can't be that bad. Do you remember Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day? Judith Viorst penned this children's book over 30 years ago. It's about a boy named Alexander who had a terrible, horrible...you know where we're going with this. Viorst will speak at a luncheon today at 11:30 a.m. River Oaks Country Club, 1600 River Oaks Boulevard. For information, call 713-522-1138. $75.