What is it about jailbirds that's sort of hot? The handcuffs, the criminal record, the orange jumpsuit that contrasts with their teary eyes? The possibility of conjugal visits? Being able to vote while your felonious partner has to stand outside with the pollsters?
Not everyone looks their best when they're getting hauled in. Some people look downright haggard as hell. Most people are either high or drunk, so it makes sense you aren't looking Cosmo or Esquire perfect as you prepare to spend some time in the clink.
But leave it to celebrities, or what passes as celebrities these days, to show us peons how to retain a shred of dignity while getting arrested.
We cobbled together a motley crew of guys and gals, all better than us since they're on television and stuff, who managed to have grace under fire and still look doable. Even Paris Hilton, for who we would still want to triple-bag it, looks like an angel that we would gladly throw a puppy in a river for.
Click ahead for the top 10.
10. Khloe Kardashian Khloe "Kong" Kardashian was arrested in 2007 for a DUI. She's easily a foot taller than both her sisters.
9. Macaulay Culkin Homebody looked like he was auditioning to play John Waters in a biopic around the time of his arrest in 2004 for pot-and-pill possession. Don't worry, they were cool pills like Xanax and stuff.
8. Chace Crawford After Gossip Girl star Chace Crawford was arrested this year for pot possession, women swooned over his mugshot with his dreamy bloodshot eyes and roguish stubble.
7. Paris Hilton True, she's probably a dirty girl, and she chews men like gum, but you can't deny that smile.
6. Nicole Richie She'll never do it again, officer. Those big, saucer-like eyes can't tell a lie. Sadly, this was when she was hauled in for heroin possession in 2003. Today, Richie is a doting mother of two kids with Joel Madden.
5. Carmen Electra Our dream girl in 1996, Electra was booked in 1999 for allegedly battering her ex-husband Dennis Rodman in a hotel room.
4. Jason Wahler He could be any guy off Washington Avenue on any weekend, right? Formerly a cast member on MTV's calamity The Hills, Wahler was more than likely taken in for drinking or something. We're not going to Google him and give him the satisfaction.
3. Shia LaBeouf "Hey girl! Can I sleep on your couch tonight and take a shower? You look really good. I always thought you were prettier than Shannon. Oh man, my shirt just fell off."
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2. Lindsay Lohan Some women have this thing called "bitch face," an almost permanent sneer of indignation. Luckily Lohan brought it with her for her last mugshot session a few weeks back. We wish her many, many more.
1. Jane Fonda Hanoi Jane looks pretty foxy here in 1970, even while she was becoming the bane of the U.S. Military's existence. She looks like could be working at Buffalo Exchange.