Film and TV

Trailer Park: Is This The Worst Trailer Ever Made?

I recently saw (dealt with? suffered?) the Step Up Revolution trailer attached to the front of the middling Jason Segel forward slash Emily Blunt rom-com The Five-Year Engagement, while on date night with the missus. Shuddup.

That was one engagement that lasted two hours and four minutes too long! Zing!

Anyhow, Step Up Revolution's trailer is easily the worst one I have ever seen in nearly three decades of watching trailers. It's bad in all the right places that you would expect a bad trailer to be bad. Like shitty music, shitty cars, shitty dialog, shitty dancing, and it's set in Miami to boot.

And what's worse, it looks like they are slapping kah-razzy hip-hop dancing onto a vague version of the Occupy movement against a greedy land developer. Time to save the block/rec center/Taco Bell.

Sorry, but dance scenes died after the sequence at the McDonald's in 1988's Mac & Me. That's just the way it is.

Protest dancing, sweat, bikinis, dudes in wife-beaters. How do these people make money?? And who is the Mob?? 20,000 hits in under five hours on your video? I can pull that easy with a blog post about the best wet T-shirt contests in cinema history.

(writes mental note)

Who needs money when everyone and everything dances! Cars, living statues, white people, Asians, stockbrokers, a robot in a fedora, and maybe, just maybe, even bad-guy Peter Gallagher's eyebrows, too. Ten bucks says that Gallagher is the only cast member who can spell or define "revolution" without Googling it or asking their PR team.

Step Up Revolution, you got the goods. See you on July 27.

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Craig Hlavaty
Contact: Craig Hlavaty