Stirred & Shaken: Kelvin Arms’ Rang Tang Martini
I was standing on the patio at Kelvin Arms (2424 Dunstan, 713-528-5002) holding the pinkest drink I’ve ever had and trying to ask my friend John to grab us a couple of beers when my voice cracked for the first time in months, maybe years. I don’t think he heard…
Five Step Plan To Being A Terrible Little League Parent (w/ VIDEO)
Let me preface this post by saying that I love my kids, all three of them. They are named James, Judy Anne, and Sammy and they are ages 12, 12, and 11. They have all played sports since virtually the time they could walk and attending their sporting events –…
Bartender Chat: Frank Moore of Gravitas
Frank Moore knows a thing or two about booze, such as when it is an appropriate time to drink. “If it’s a day of the week that ends in the word ‘day,'” he says, “it’s a good day to drink.” So it makes sense that he’s been bartending for more…
Walmart’s Greatest Hits… Or Maybe Not (NSFW)
Growing up in Pearland, Craig’s Hlist didn’t know anything was inherently wrong with Walmart. We didn’t see it as trashy. How could a place where we got baseball cards and metal magazines every Saturday be trashy? But when we got older and heard the tales of Walmart’s wrongful business practices…
Westbury Represent: Shannon Walker Talks From Space To The Three HISD Schools She Attended
Shannon Walker, the first Houston-raised astronaut, is up in space doing space-y things, but she took some time today to hook up with her old `hood.A video link to the three HISD schools Walker attended — Parker Elementary (which also claims Beyonce as an alumnus), Johnston Middle School and Westbury…
How To Get My Job: Art Courier
Earlier this month we talked with Dr. Peter Marzio, director of the Museum of Fine Arts, Houston, about a rash of overseas art thefts and how the museum guards against potential security threats. It’s easier to protect artwork when it’s hanging in a museum, but what about works the museum…
Cash Smuggling: Growing Problem For Mexican Gangs?
Smuggling large piles of cash ain’t easySure, running a drug ring is the road to riches. You bring the stuff over the border, you get tons of money.But then you have to get that money back over the border. And as banks — including those in Mexico — get better…
Planet Houston: For All Your Pho and Fufu Needs
In the midst of all the hubbub about the long-awaited Best of Houston® awards, we decided to spotlight a few places that might not necessarily make it onto any mainstream Best Of lists. Planet Houston, this week’s cover story, focuses on immigrant food. After all, we’re a nation — and…
Aubrey’s In Aldine: A Honky-Tonk Time Warp
As mentioned in our honky-tonk cover story last month, Aubrey’s Club in north Houston is a step back in time. Lonesome Onry and Mean drove out there last winter to catch longtime Houston country singer Country Jim Sloan, and we were most pleased with what we found. For one thing,…
Metro Execs Riding Buses Or Rail: Not Quite What It Seems
Metro’s Senior Management Team is being forced to experience the wild world of public transportation. George Greanias, Metro’s president, dropped a bombshell at a budget meeting earlier this week, announcing that the agency’s Senior Management Team is turning in its company cars and being required to ride buses or the…
DWTS’ Michael Bolton is a “Very, Very Bad” Dog, Demands Public Apology From Judge Bruno Tonioli
Oh Mr. Bolton, where do we begin? When a man wearing a Dalmatian suit jacket crawls out of a doghouse (with a big sign that says BOLT) lured by a 20 something with a bone on a cutesy-pie set, he’d damn well better have moves like Justin Timberlake. Otherwise we’re…
Healthiest (And Also Worst) Prospective Vending Machine Foods Ever
Schools in Cincinnati and Syracuse are the guinea pigs in an experiment to get kids to eat healthier. They’re doing this by providing vending machines filled with carrots. Ah, but not just carrots: three-ounce bags of baby carrots dolled up to look like more familiar snack foods. Ingenious! With just…
Best Of Houston 2010 Is Here And It’s Indispensable
You’ve waited for it, and now your patience has been rewarded. The 2010 version of the Houston Press’ Best of Houston has hit the web, and will soon hit the streets.You can peruse staff and reader picks for the best in local cuisine, city life, sports and any other thing…
(No) Surprise: White Stallion Coal Plant Approved By Texas’ Air Watchdog
TCEQ says “Great!!” to controversial coal plantMatagorda County elected officials didn’t want it. Local citizens vigorously protested against it. Clean-air advocated spent gobs of time and money trying to fight it, warning that the proposed While Stallion coal-fired plant would cripple Houston’s efforts to combat ozone.Even the Texas Commission on…
The Olsen Twins: Now Chopped And Screwed!
Now that screwing and chopping can be done without even using turntables, the technique has become all the rage on the Internet. And it’s made a great leap forward into video. Now not only are the jams slowed and throwed, but so are the pictures. Nowhere has this been pulled…
Mini-Tinis and Mini Pizzas at Caffe Bello
Happy hour at Caffe Bello draws all types, from the two gay men on my left last week who were in search of a good cigar bar to the older, well-dressed couple who were quizzing the bartender about where he’d worked in the past over a bottle of white. “You…
Caucasian Sheriff’s Deputies Group Gets Its Payroll Deduction
Caucasian Law Enforcement Association: Joe Strummer knew how you feelBuried beneath the onslaught of Commissioners Court activity yesterday was a vote that gives legitimacy to a group calling itself the Caucasian Law Enforcement Assocation.Without discussion, commissioners approved a request that CLEA be allowed to let its members pay their dues…
Chef Kent Rathbun’s Amazing Bell Pepper Trick
Eating Our Words had the opportunity to attend Central Market’s “From Pint to Plate with Kent Rathbun” class on Monday, just one of many events surrounding Central Market’s “Discover Brewtopia” celebration. You may remember Kent Rathbun as the chef who took down Bobby Flay on the Food Network’s Iron Chef…
Rocky Horror Picture Show: The Ultimate Covers Mixtape
The Rocky Horror Picture Show turns 35 this week. Rocks Off started going to the midnight queen of cult movies at the River Oaks Theater when we were just 15 years old, and has now strapped on high heels and corsets as part of the cast for the better part…
Electric Cars & Pedicabs: New ‘Low Speed Shuttle’ Ordinance Goes Before City Committee Thursday
After months of waiting and hoping and wishing, Erik Ibarra, the founder of REV Eco-Shuttle, may have finally got what he’s wanted. Yesterday on Twitter, he announced that he had received good news, that the Regulatory Affairs department for the City of Houston had come up with a revised ordinance that…
Brew Blog: Decadent Imperial IPA from Ska Brewing
With hot weather seemingly on the way out, we’ve been trying to work through a backlog of inventive bitter beers to maybe give you folks something new to sample before the weather turns and our tastes all shift a bit. With that goal in mind, we grabbed a Decadent Imperial…
Vid Picks of the Week: The YouTube Play Biennial, Part 2
What makes an online video exceptional? How is an online gallery different from one with four walls? These were certainly questions of interest to YouTube and the Solomon R. Guggenheim Museum (and Art Attack). Yesterday, we started counting down our top 10 favorite videos from the YouTube/Guggenheim joint biennial YouTube…
Three Songs, No Flash: Mark C. Austin’s Life In The Pit
This evening, local rock photographer Mark C. Austin unveils his first exhibit of his work since he began shooting bands almost five years ago. Austin’s work has appeared in print and online for the Houston Press and Rocks Off, Village Voice, Paste, SPIN, People and the Houston Chronicle. The opening…
Luis Escobar: Family Sues, Claims Sheriff’s Deputies Shot Him Three Times In The Back
Family files suit over police shootingTeenager Luis Escobar was shot in the back three times by a Harris County sheriff’s deputy during a traffic stop gone terribly wrong. And now, nearly a year and a half later, Escobar’s family has decided to sue the officer and the county. As is…
Chef Chat, Part 1: Minh Nguyen of Café TH (formerly Thiem Hung)
Eating Our Words recently caught up with Minh Nguyen of Café TH, formerly known as Thiem Hung, to discuss transitioning the business from the former owners and his 5-year vision for the place. EOW: I understand that when you purchased Thiem Hung from the previous owners, you had to learn…
Pee Wee Football Coaches Wallop Each Other In Pearland (Video)
Wait a second — we thought Pee Wee Football was all about sportsmanship. That’s what the ads tell us. Are they lying?Possibly, in Pearland. Check out the video from KHOU of a coach going upside the head of another coach during a game two weeks ago…
Rap’s Top 10 Heroes Of 2010 So Far, Part 2
Each Wednesday, Rocks Off arbitrarily appoints one lucky local performer or group “Artist of the Week,” bestowing upon them all the fame and grandeur such a lofty title implies. Know a band or artist that isn’t awful? Email their particulars to sheaserrano@gmail.com. This past Saturday night, a purple bastard named…
Ways Not To Go: Dead In An Adult-Bookstore Booth For More Than 12 Hours
Not the bookstore in question, but still a nice pictureThere are simple, dignified ways to leave this vale of tears, and then there are other ways.Among the other ways: Dying in a booth at an adult bookstore, with your body not being found for more than 12 hours.That’s how Brodrick…
A Second Chance at The Chocolate Bar
I quickly forgave The Chocolate Bar for my mediocre slice of Really Rocky Road Cake. It wasn’t hard. I’m far too much of a cocoa-crazed fiend to spurn the town’s only establishment solely dedicated to my drug. As some readers pointed out, I probably should have immediately returned the cake…
Someecards.com: All the News (Commentary) You Need
Just in case you’ve been living under a rock, someecards.com is a free online e-card service that mocks the gooey sentimentality of the traditional greeting card. Bitch-slaps it right across the face is more like it. The company’s cards range from tacky and odd to outrageous-even-by-internet-standards naughty. Its motto, “When…
Last Night: CocoRosie At Fitzgerald’s
CocoRosie Fitzgerald’s September 28, 2010 A kaleidoscope of musical and visual colors filled up the second floor of Fitzgerald’s Tuesday evening as Bianca and Sierra Cassady of CocoRosie performed a nearly two-hour set for an enthusiastic crowd. Still glowing from the new remodeling transformation, the upstairs stage served as a…
Stephone Taylor: Mayor Steals Town’s Lawnmower
Mayor Stephone Taylor IS the lawnmower manA former small-town Texas official’s crime spree may have finally come to an end: Former Anahuac City Administrator Stephone Taylor, currently the mayor of Ringgold, Louisiana, has “pleaded no contest in Anahuac, Texas, to theft by a public servant.” Chambers County prosecutors had charged…
Lone Star’s a Cow Patty
Eight days and two episodes after the curtain came up on Lone Star, Fox has pulled the plug on the show. On one hand, it’s hard to view this behavior as anything out of the ordinary for Fox, a network that’s notoriously trigger-happy and no stranger to cutting a show…
Case Keenum Faces The Future
The Houston Cougars knew they were going to have to eventually make the transition. They just weren’t counting on that transition coming during the middle of this season’s third game. But it was during the second quarter of the Cougars’ loss to the UCLA Bruins that quarterback Case Keenum tried…
Sampler Plate: This Week In Food Blogs
Each week, we put together a sampler plate of the most interesting links from both local and national food blogs. Know a blog we should be paying particular attention to? Leave the address in the comments section below. The Mighty Rib: Kevin’s been on the road lately and reviewing restaurants…
Woodlands Co-Op Exchanging Signs For Private Shows
One of the things Rocks Off never had in our musical life was a big banner proclaiming our band’s undisputed awesomeness. Nor did we have a bass-drum cover with the name emblazoned across the front. Honestly, it left us feeling quite a bit like we weren’t legitimate without them, but…
Glee: It’s Brittany, Bitch
Where’s Focus on the Family when you need them? Between this week’s library masturbation scene and a “sex riot” that was almost enough to make me wish J.D. from Heathers had planted a bomb in the bowels of William McKinley High, I’d have thought James Dobson would be furiously firing…
Jersey Village Sinking Into The Abyss, And This Time Not Metaphorically
Jersey Village: Going, going, goneJersey Village is sinking like the Titanic, and anyone who continues to live there is sure to be sucked into the Earth’s core, according to a recent geological study of Houston. Well, maybe that’s a bit of an overstatement — but parts of JV are indeed…
Maria Ipina: Valley Cops Say Toddler Caught Peddling Weed Door-to-Door
First rule, kid: Don’t take nothing but cashEven the most grizzled cops in the Rio Grande Valley town of San Juan say this is a new one for them, and that’s saying something. They say they have had to remove a four-year-old girl from her home after neighbors complained that…
