Venues
Buffalo Bayou Park, along Allen Parkway, just west of downtown Cynthia Woods Mitchell Pavilion, 2005 Lake Robbins Drive, 281-363-3300, www.woodlandscenter.org Engine Room, 1515 Pease, 713-654-7846, www.engineroomhouston.net Mary Jane’s Fat Cat, 4216 Washington Ave., 713-869-5263, www.clubfatcat.com Hobby Center for the Performing Arts, 800 Bagby, 713-315-2525, www.thehobbycenter.org Houston Pride Festival, Westheimer at…
Blowhards
Aceyalone and others appear , at the .
Long Bomb
Adam Sandler cast as a former pro quarterback — that laughable setup is about the only funny thing in this pointless, witless remake of The Longest Yard, which wasn’t intended to be taken as a comedy in 1974 and won’t be mistaken for one in its latest incarnation. (It was…
Excess Hollywood
By our count, there are but two sequels waiting to have oil rubbed on their backs this summer — one featuring an evil lord named Vader, the other featuring an evil lord named Schneider — so the season has that going for it, which is nice. But in lieu of…
Play It Pretty for Cabaret Voltaire
The first time you hear it, it’s pretty damn funny. You’re at a show by a hip band, say Bright Eyes or something, and there’s a break in the action — maybe some strings need tuning or replacing, or a roadie has to come out and fix a mike. As…
Thick and Rich
Layer Cake, the new British crime drama from first-time director Matthew Vaughn, is a block of granite struggling to liberate the statue inside it. Vaughn (producer of Snatch and Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels) has plenty of dark threat and compelling visual style, but his ambitious trip into the…
We Know What You Should Do This Summer
In a lot of places, summer is a time to throw open your doors and run outside to play play play the days away. That’s not always the case in Houston, as the oppressive heat drives some folks into the air-conditioned comfort of their homes, and maybe to a bar…
Take Me Out…
You need look no further than a John Hughes movie (or your own adolescence) to realize that jocks and freaks don’t really mix. But occasionally the seemingly disparate paths of pro athletes and musicians do cross, from jocks trying to be rockers (Jack McDowell, Scott Radinsky) to rockers honoring jocks…
Home Fires Burning
If you’re trying to navigate the gulf between the absolutist view inside Fortress Bush and the relativist politics of Western Europe, you need go no further than Brothers, a provocative new drama from Denmark. Superficially, it’s an intimate and rather self-contained film, but director Susanne Bier (Open Hearts, The One…
Horse Shoed
Demonstrators at the Four Seasons were already drenched in sweat by mid-morning. Wearing pig snouts and Dick Cheney masks, they pounded out a discordant complaint of banjo, whistle and drum while Halliburton shareholders were meeting inside. A cadre of police horses on the asphalt pranced nervous circles, their eyes wild…
Invasion of the Giant Cheeseburgers
Is anything hipper than Midtown right now? Young studs in screen-printed button-ups waltz around its newly refurbished streets looking for action. Tanned and toned ladies with tiny lower-back tattoos strap on high heels and pound the pavement, eschewing foot health in favor of glamour. You know the places: Komodo’s Pub,…
Style Pile
Most of Tom Stoppard’s lesser works beat the best works of his contemporaries. The playwright is engaged in a lifelong affair with the English language — puns, word games, linguistic curlicues and wonderfully windy monologues dance through his plays as high and low art mix with a knowing, sly wink…
No Pain, No Gain
Texas death row inmates have gone out in style before some have used their last words to thank the Dallas Cowboys for years of pleasure but on April 20 Douglas Roberts joined the Kings of Style pantheon. Yes sir, warden, he said when asked if he had any final thoughts…
Spoon
Spoon’s 2002 effort, Kill the Moonlight, put pop smarts and experimentation on equal footing with an admiration for both the Rolling Stones and Wire. People loved it, too — it plainly stated that Spoon wasn’t here to play the indie-rock game, and instead intended to write big solid songs that…
Capsule Reviews
Done to Death Vermont playwright Fred Carmichael’s 30-plus light romances and murder comedies have been a boon to regional theaters, and his works and patronage have been instrumental in the reputation and success of that state’s Dorset Theatre Playhouse. If you’re acquainted with one of his most performed plays, thanks…
Bohacked Off
Last week Hair Balls took note of the legislative skill and daring of state Representative Dwayne Bohac, who stage-managed a rush committee vote to kill a socialistic, do-gooder bill that would have further hampered the efforts of corporations to take part in Texas democracy. Did Bohac, a Houston Republican, appreciate…
Fiona Apple
Fiona Apple’s unreleased third album is all over the Net now, liberated by copyright unbelievers. Some posting the music to their blogs are conflicted: They satisfy their craving for Apple’s music, knowing she’ll see not one penny, but they justify their deeds. After all, they will say, she’s being held…
He’s Got Guts
Do you faint at the sight of blood? Here’s a tip: Skip the Herman Nitsch show “The Orgies Mysteries Theater” at the Station. It presents enough images of blood and guts to make an abattoir look like a paper cut. Nitsch is one of the core members of the Vienna…
Modeling On The Cheap
On May 12, the Houston Chronicle, in a blatant bid to get more skin on its pages, published a swimsuit preview called “Grin and Bare It.” The story included a set of photographs showing how different swimsuit styles can help out different body types. “What’s Your Type?” it asked, and…
Various Artists
Luaka Bop’s third volume in this series — following discs devoted to Brazil’s Os Mutantes and California’s Shuggie Otis — is subtitled “The Funky Fuzzy Sounds of West Africa.” That’s a far better descriptor than “world psychedelia,” because, while fans of the Grateful Dead and the Quicksilver Messenger Service may…
Capsule Reviews
“Inversion” It looks like someone shot a giant cannon at the old Art League studio building on Montrose — you can see straight through it. Called Inversion, it’s an amazing, traffic-stopping project; the elderly wooden bungalow has been transformed into a piece of art instead of an art studio. The…
Letters
Up in Smoke Head butts: I can’t think of a more worthless cause to defend and more worthless arguments than that smoking helps you pick up chicks, burn calories and that it generates tax revenue [“Got a Light?” by Keith Plocek, May 12]. As if there were no better ways…
Charlie Poole
You Ain’t Talkin’ to Me, a three-disc set that collects 40 sides from Charlie Poole alongside 32 cuts from the banjo plunker’s contemporaries and descendants, is a great next step for anyone interested in exploring the roots of country music beyond Jimmie Rodgers and the Carter Family. Some will want…
Barbecue Identity Theft
At 11:45 a.m. on a Tuesday, there’s a line stretching out the front door and across the porch of Luling City Market, the barbecue joint on Richmond. At the end of the line is the guy who carves the meat. You tell him how much you want, and he throws…
Shaking It Up
— Christie Taylor
Z-Ro
Z-Ro (born Joseph McVey) has long had the Southwestern streets on lock. People around here regard the gruff baritone-voiced ex-con and retired crack dealer as a real-ass street poet — the Southern Tupac or the second coming of Scarface. The Northeast, Midwest and the West Coast are other matters, and…
All You Have to Do Is Ask
The nice thing about eating at Carmelo’s Italian Restaurant (14795 Memorial, 281-531-0696) is that the chef is happy to make your favorite dish, even if it’s not on the menu. We recommend requesting the vitello fiorentino ($20). The dish starts out with four wafer-thin slices of veal, gently sautéed in…
Off the Beaten Path
Ah, Kemah, land of the 30-acre boardwalk theme park and home to Tilman Fertitta’s Aquarium, where tourists eat seafood next to giant fish tanks filled with the distant brethren of their meals. With multiple amusement park rides, the Kemah Boardwalk is jam-packed in the summer with worn-out-looking families, likely in…
This Week’s Day-by-Day Picks
Thursday, May 26 Comedian Daniel Tosh has a unique, if not completely PC, take on cannibalism. “If you had to eat another person to survive, do you think they’d taste like their ethnic background?” he asks. “Do you think Mexicans are spicy? Chinese people — are you hungry 30 minutes…
To Scale the Throne, with Daimonion, Teratism, Nocturne, Thornspawn, Sumeria, Dagon and Cataglyphis
To Scale the Throne’s vocalist Ghatanathoa does an uncanny impression of a possession-provoked projectile-vomiter. His evil heaves aren’t easily decipherable — often, the only clear word is “suicide,” which he enunciates with demonic glee — but his ominous intent needs no translation. Guitarists Idimmuxul and Nekrofukk alternate between shredding and…
Motorcycle Madness
Bikers have been rebelling against convention since Gottlieb Daimler attached a gas engine to a bicycle in 1885. And 125 years later, with gas prices topping $2 a gallon, only a reprobate would spend all summer riding around with mere pleasure in mind, right? Wrong. Plenty of people think guzzling…
Jam Session
— Scott Faingold screens at Rice University, entrance No. 8 (University Boulevard at Stockton Drive).
Jimmie Dale Gilmore
Lately Jimmie Dale Gilmore albums and appearances have been about as rare as a Thomas Pynchon novel or sighting. It’s been five years since the release of the Buddy Miller-produced One Endless Night, which included as many covers as Gilmore originals. Along with Lubbock/ Austin compadres Joe Ely and Butch…
Booking It
No matter how many summer vacations you plan or how well you plan them, a moment comes when you realize that you will never sword-fight with Lord of the Rings fans in Kazakhstan or reach that tiny island off the north coast of Australia where the school shuts down for…
Dang, You’ve Got Skills!
Dude, of course you know what a “liger” is (it’s, like, a lion and a tiger mixed — bred for its skills in magic, duh). And you totally know that Rex Kwon Do is, like, the greatest of all martial arts. Heck yes, you do. Well, you do if you’ve…
Dreamfest 2
Musically speaking, are you something of an Anglophile? Do you demand some dream in your pop? Do you like to gaze at your shoes? Or do you just want the chance to check out 32 local and regional bands in one day? If you answered “Word up, beeyotch!” to any…
Recommended Reading
You Can’t Get There from Here By Gayle Forman Rodale, $23.95 Chasing Matisse By James Morgan Free Press, $25 The 8:55 to Baghdad By Andrew Eames Overlook, $24.95 A Continent for the Taking By Howard W. French Vintage, $15 Wrong About Japan By Peter Carey Knopf, $17.95 Japan Journals 1974-2004…
Fun with Guns
MON 5/30 So, you’re a regular magic-bullet-shooting Lee Harvey hotshot whose skill with the scope makes the sniper in Full Metal Jacket look like a rent-a-cop. Yeah, we get it; you’re a regular whiz when it comes to pitching pellets, a Roger Clemens of the range. You just can’t help…
Machine Head, with Devil Driver and It Dies Today
In 2003, Machine Head was metal’s most compelling comeback. It’s still touring in support of that year’s Through the Ashes of Empires, perhaps because doubting disciples needed time to verify its miraculous resurrection. The San Francisco-based band’s 1994 debut disc, Burn My Eyes, fused intense clenched-teeth vocals and riff-and-recoil guitars…
Grass Routes
When the calendar strikes June in Houston, it’s tempting to stay inside, game controller in hand, bottled water nearby and cool, conditioned air swirling all around. But even the staunchest of humidity-haters need to get outside once in a while; cabin fever isn’t limited to wintry climates. Fortunately, Houston has…
Pell-Mel
THU 5/26 If you’re at all hip to the Austin hip-hop scene, you’re familiar with DJ Mel. Or, more precisely, you’re familiar with his monthly Rock the Casbah parties and Wednesday-night Krunkaoke, where folks can motormouth their favorite Lil Jon, Wu-Tang, N.W.A and other lyrics that bring out the MC…
Stereo Total, with the Kimonos, Carter Brown and the Wiggins
There’s something sexy about Euros. No? Whether it’s the fashion, the accent or the “how do you say” innocence, something keeps us intrigued. Berlin-based Stereo Total has every bit of the above, plus a sound that packs Serge Gainsbourg, Brigitte Bardot, Devo, Plastic Bertrand and Jean-Jacques Perrey into one pleasant…
Sparkling Waters
If Shakespeare had lived in Houston during the summer, he would have surely written, “Get thee to some agua, pronto!” And with such proximity to lakes, man-made pools and that little ol’ Gulf of Mexico, summer H20 fun is nearly as mandatory as mosquito repellent. Here are some of your…
Golden Ruhl
Though she’s just barely out of her twenties, Sarah Ruhl has become a veritable theatrical force. The graduate of Brown University’s prestigious playwriting program has seen her work produced at some of the country’s headiest venues. Oh, and this year, she was a finalist for the Pulitzer Prize. Houstonians will…
Jeff Black
Jeff Black is one of those guys the public is barely cognizant of yet is known to virtually everyone in the Nashville songwriting fraternity. Black is essentially a solo singer-songwriter, one of the almost invisible craftsmen who populate the vast blurry creative backwoods of Nashville, just another moving part of…
Hot Shows
Whoa, Nelly, it’s that time again, the summer concert season. You’d think that more bands would be forward-thinking enough to come visit us in the winter, rather than come sweat with us in the summertime, but every year they come, dragging us into the muggy streets to dance with them…
Swede Emotion
The (International) Noise Conspiracy appears , at . The
Animal Crackers
It’s fair to say that Madagascar, directed by one man who made Antz and another who used to work on Ren & Stimpy, is virtually plot-free — nothing more, really, than a scene or two from The Great Escape cut and pasted into an episode of Survivor. Its threadbare story…