As long as Mac Miller has been hot, we've been under the assumption that he only has shine because his indie labelmate Wiz Khalifa scored a radio hit. No one can actually like this dude because he raps well. No one could've possibly followed his career since the release of "But My Macking Ain't Easy." Evidently we were wrong.
A couple years ago, a friend told us the reason why he loves Mac Miller so much: because he doesn't take himself too seriously and raps about fun stuff like partying with his friends, smoking weed, and dating girls. And he has bravado.
We're just not into it. Even after listening to a few of his mixtapes, we're not convinced. His lyrics are corny, his voice is monotonous and indicative of a serious sinus infection. Really...just watch some of his videos, it looks like he can't breathe through his nose. Dude's mouth is constantly open.
Plus, he's the poster boy for everything that is wrong with hip-hop today: snap back cap frat boy rap.
The one thing we are convinced of when it comes to Mac Miller is that the kid is keeping a watchful eye on middle school girls' Facebook statuses. Every line sounds like it could be from a page out of a pubescent 14 year old's diary. Take a look for yourself-we found these Mac Miller Memes on Tumblr, all created by his biggest fans.
Well my crew too live but I ain't Uncle Luke. And I ain't no hipster, girl I can make your hips stir. - "Frick Park Market"
While we were googling the lyrics, the first thing that came up was "What does 'hips stir' mean?" We'll tell you what it means, kids: when your hips are stirring it means you need to stop Google searching because you're coming down with a terrible virus.
Girl I don't wanna share you. We could be together, but you're scared to. - "All I Want Is You"
She's probably scared to be with you because of that mug, bro. Those Gary Busey jaws have the power to rip someone's face off.
If life's a joke then I'm waiting for the punch. You all about the beef, but me, I'm about the bun. - "Life Ain't Easy"
Oh, how original. That old fashioned meat-bread reference. Somewhere there is a kid who's saying to his friends, "What he means is that he doesn't care about arguing...he just cares about making money!!"
They tell me I'm the shit I'm like, duh?! Girls on my dick I'm like, duh!? Gettin stupid in this bitch so wassup! Wake the whole damn world homie, I don't give a fuck. - "Wake Up"
What does this even mean? Extra cool points for having a Bob Marley "No Woman No Cry" tattoo as a chest piece. Bob wouldn't want da yout dem to be listening to this shit.
They gonna try to tell you no, shatter all your dreams, but you gotta get up and go to bigger better things. Live free. - "Live Free"
Live Free, Die Young. Or is it Live Free, Die Hard? Or is it Live Hard, Die Free? By the way, we listened to this song and it's basically #hashtag rap like Drake or Nicki Minaj specializes in.
They told me never fall in love it never works out in your favor. You're way too young right now and that's just human nature. - "All I Want Is You"
We have to admit that this one is our favorite. This little girl or boy was probably very excited about making an addition to the collection of inspirational love quotes by Mac Miller. Look at the use of C O M I C S A N S. Bless their heart.
I'm cool with it, chillin with some buddah smoke. I always do it big like Jewish nose. Cadillacs, I'm tryna to get a few of those - "Under The Weather"
Mac Miller, who celebrated his Bar Mitzvah only six years ago, teaching impressionable youth some antisemitic propaganda at an early age!
Here's an inspirational quote from the modern day Wordsworth, Mac Miller. We're pretty sure we saw this on a greeting card one time.