Ever since 2000, when I first set eyes on the White Stripes' Meg White, I have had a crush on the little drummer girl. So, you would think that a supposed sex tape would have me and other pervo indie boys all aflutter. Alas, it's a bit of a letdown.
I have downloaded it. I mean, this dude I know downloaded it at his house; he just told me about it. Okay, I have it on my computer. First off, the thing is only three minutes long. The girl looks similar to Meg, and she has the same build and tall black hair, but that’s pretty much it. Plus, it seems as if it was filmed in a dorm room in Finland. And her “co-star,” isn’t exactly Detroit rock-princess material. He’s got that weird Nordic upturned nose thing, like the kind of guy named Lars you’d see in foreign-exchange student pamphlets. For all we know, he may enjoy soccer, reading and hiking. But one thing’s for sure, those foreign-exchange student dudes could party. – Craig Hlavaty
Jenny Lewis, your move....