The popular image that you may have of our people is that we hang out in graveyards dressed in black while hammered on absinthe and listening to :Wumpscut. Three of the four of those are fairly accurate, but it's the hanging out in graveyards thing that we're discussing today.
Gothtopia has always felt that cavorting around someone's eternal resting place was a little insensitive. It has just always felt wrong to us. Not all the time, we don't fault Asmodeus X for filming "Voices of the Fallen" at a local cemetery. On the other hand, Candy Apple Blue's "Graveyard" music video is an affront to all taste... mostly because it's bloody terrible.
So what is the proper behavior in a cemetery? To answer the questions we decided to gather the Gothic Council. Joining the Council this week is stylist Carol Daeumer, Punky Moms founder Sarah Fanning, his Excellency the Count of Montrose, hearse enthusiast and blogger Desiree Stark, contributor to Carpe Nocturne Magazine Alethea Carr, and spooky dessertier Lynda Rouner.
Carol Daeumer: It really depends on who is buried there. In the case of historic cemeteries (Paris, New Orleans) I think it is okay. Most of the dead are either historical figures, celebrities or are long-forgotten with no relatives to mourn them. These places generally have active tourism.
Now, should you go down to your local cemetery that still has active burials on a regular basis and fang-tard about? No. There are genuine mourners at these, and it is offensive to them. Hanging out with the dead might seem fun for you, but those who have recently lost a loved one, the last thing they need are some black-clad twits giggling and humping the headstones.
Sarah Fanning: My husband and I recently had this very discussion. I took the family to an old cemetery (est. 1808) here in Alexandria, Va., for an afternoon outing. We always see it driving home from Whole Foods and the kids were curious about it. I am certainly not going to say no when my kids ask to check out a cemetery. So off we went.
Matty, my husband, was upset that we were being disrespectful. I disagreed. Many of the older graves there were neglected, which says to me the deceased no longer have family coming to pay their respects rendering them essentially forgotten. Our visiting the cemetery and reading their tombstones is a way of honoring the lives that these people had.
And when you reallying think about it. Every step you take is on the grave of someone or something that lived and died here through our time.
