Whatever

Your Third Nipple Makes Me “Smile”

I used to think third nipples were an unsightly and grotesque part of the human anatomy. The thought of having three of something on your body where evolution only deemed us to have two, is a tad freakish. The only notable exception I can find is that chick from Total Recall. But I digress....

Lily Allen is every hipster boy’s dream. She’s got the whole big frilly dress and side-swept bangs thing, plus her music isn’t as grating and punishing as, say, Fergie’s. Plus I’m pretty sure she was born female. And if Lily saw fit to pummel me to the ground, I would welcome it wholeheartedly.

She’s a lush, but she doesn’t drink turpentine in a dark alley like Amy Winehouse does. A few days ago on a BBC chat-show, Lily was asked a series of canned corn questions. One of them was if she had a third nipple. Guess what? She demurely showed the crowd. It was so damn adorable. Like a basket of newborn kittens being held by the Easter Bunny, while he’s riding in Santa’s sleigh.

Hot triple-nipple action after the jump. – Craig Hlavaty