Earlier this afternoon, online of course, the Houston Press revealed the winners of our very first ever Houston Web Awards. The awards will be handed out in the flesh tomorrow night at Momentum Audi on Richmond, because it's still very hard to email someone a trophy.
The awards start at 7 p.m. and will be hosted by Brittanie Shey and Craig Hlavaty, esteemed members of Team Rocks Off. Even better, one of the busiest Houstonians both online and in the real world, talented "Luv It Mayne" rapper Fat Tony, will be there as "special guest" - DJ, presenter and performer. Tony does it all.
Tony and producer Tom Cruz are currently working on the follow-up to last year's much-adored LP RABDARGAB, which the rapper tells us will be out this winter on Greedhead, the label owned by Heems of Das Racist. We don't know where he finds the time, but a man's still gotta eat, so Rocks Off asked the Fat One to tell us a few of his favorite songs about food. He didn't disappoint.
Tony eats, he says, "Not only to hold true to my much-adored, cartoon-mafia-derived moniker and former body dysmorphic disorder more commonly known as adolescence, but to fucking survive. These are the songs that have fueled every lift of fork to mouth and ass to toilet."
Descendents, "I Like Food"
"Any song under 20 seconds that contains two of my favorite nouns (burgers & fries) and two of my favorite adjectives (juicy & greasy) is truly a tune after my own heart. I like my music like I like my women - easy and with a limited vocabulary."
Goodie Mob, "Soul Food"
I never grew up enjoying most soul food very much but I love Goodie Mob. I'm 99 percent sure my grandmother is quite disappointed by both of these things.
Shonen Knife, "Brown Mushrooms"
I hate mushrooms but love Shonen Knife, easily the greatest Japanese Ramonescore rock and roll band to ever sing about food ever. Also my favorite band with the word "knife" in their name (followed by No Knife, of course). Luckily, I saw Shonen Knife at an Austin festival couple years back. In the middle of their set the punkest of punk pack of teenage brats (most likely stoned off glue) shoved me and other average-looking citizens all the way the fuck out the way to get to the front, but soon as I started slam-dancing into them they begin whine and tell me how "not cool" I'm being. Life is strange.
Ramones, "I Just Want To Have Something To Do"
"Hanging out on second avenue / eating chicken vindaloo / I just want to be with you / I just want to have something to do" is the most romantic verse about boredom stemming from hunger, longing, and loneliness I've ever heard. They don't make 'em like they used to.
Beastie Boys, "Egg Man"
Eggs are great, man. I think you vegans got the wrong idea. How can you hate a food that works so well as a meal and a projectile? Just might egg the next PETA rep in these streets I see passing out pamphlets. Might have to wait 'til the fall though. I know you guys are very busy with Warped Tour and overpriced festivals from coast to coast.
