Screwston, Texas

The Ten (Or So) Most Vital Screw Tapes Of All Time

Monday, at the Screwed Up Records & Tapes shop (7717 Cullen Blvd.), from at least 5:20 p.m. to 6:20 p.m. (and likely beyond), the magnanimous Southside, a man who has worked the window there for the past decade or so, sat quiet as a plum. He was reading a Bible, of all things.

It's appropriate, what with the store's closing date a little more than a week away, but only if you're trying extra hard to be clever. The Bible is the Bible, and reading it is rarely an analogy for anything. The store is closing and that's that. Shit.

No one will speak on where, or even when, the new location will open, only that one eventually will. So with sad eyes, we asked Southside the most clichéd, most complex simple question we could: Were someone who had never listened to Screw to wander into the store, which ten tapes would you describe to that person as being the most vital?

His response: Pursed lips for half a second, then, "I can make you a list." In a little less than two minutes, scribbled in no real order on the back of an old receipt, he'd written down 12.