10 Gloriously Terrible Lesser-Known Motivational '80s Songs to Pump! You Up!

If my gym is any indication, Olympics Fever is spurring folks into action. There used to be plenty of elliptical machines, barbells, and room in the pool available during the time of day I would go. Now it seems like every elliptical machine is taken except the one in front of the wonky TV that only ever picks up staticky Fox News, the line for a lane to open up in the pool looks like the line to get into a Tony Bennett concert -- old people love the pool -- and the barbells section is in total disarray from newbies who bit off way more than they could chew, felt something pop, and limped the hell out of there, leaving the barbells to lie where they fell.

Yes, seeing the ultimate victories of total strangers who have been busting their asses to obssessive-compulsive levels their entire lives has given people who would have otherwise let their gym memberships quietly leech $25 a month out of their debit accounts the will to go work out.

Which is great! We're all for motivation, however it happens. But it fades so quickly, doesn't it? In another short week, the Olympics will be over. How will Pavlov's gym rats find the will to get back inside the gym without hearing John Williams' hypertrumpets blasting the Olympic fanfare 200 times a day?

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John Seaborn Gray