30 Seconds to Mars

Here's a fun fact: In December, Jared Leto will turn 40. For those of us who hear his name and still think first of pretty boy Jordan Catalano, this is a bit of a mindfuck. Even more so, however, when you consider that 15 years after the cancellation of My So-Called Life broke the hearts of middle schoolers from Midland to Miami, Leto is still pandering to the same demographic. Occasionally sporting mascara, a pink mohawk that makes him look like a candy-coated rooster and the sleeveless-glove-painted-nail combination that is catnip to the preteen set, Leto's late-career turn as front man for the high-sheen screamo outfit 30 Seconds to Mars means that after decades spent brooding in front of crowds and cameras, he's still never had to endure the indignity of being beloved by someone his own age.
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Caleb Hannan
Contact: Caleb Hannan