Rocks Off sat down with Keeton Coffman, lead singer of The 71s, to see what we good learn about the man we once called "God's punk-ass kid" in 30 seconds.
Rocks Off: What is the worst song in the world?
Keeton Coffman: Not sure - I just hope it's not one of mine.
RO: What is the best lyric in the world?
KC: "the more you know the less you feel, some pray while others steal - blessings not just for the ones who kneel.... luckily." - Bono
RO: Someone throws a beer bottle at you. What do you do?
KC: Duck - beer bottles can really hurt when they hit you in the head.
RO: Without worrying about time, space, or physical laws, what would be the ultimate gig?
KC: I think I could settle for playing a concert in Time Square on New Years Eve.... but more realistically, our dream is to play Red Rocks in Denver, Colo.
RO: What will you buy with your first million dollars?
KC: Seriously - my wife and I are a big fan of this nonprofit called Compassion International. They have schools all over the world that feed and educate children in impoverished communities. I'd give a lot to them... Also, I'm a big fan of Blue Bell Rocky Road Ice cream... so, after a half-gallon of that stuff... a Slurpee. No wait - two Slurpees.
RO: What would you buy with your last dollar?
KC: Something for my brother, Rob.
RO: If you could canonize another musician as a saint, who would it be and of what would they be the patron saint?
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KC: The guys in my band collectively - They would be the Patron Saints of Faith - because they help me keep mine.
The 71s play House of Blues with Jud Johnson Band and Strings, Brad Sayles & Divisi Strings and Dimitri's Rail Friday, Jan. 14.
Jef With One F is the author of The Bible Spelled Backwards Does Not Change the Fact That You Cannot Kill David Arquette and Other Things I Learned In the Black Math Experiment, available now.