Aftermath: The Black Eyed Peas Smell Like Entertainment At RodeoHouston

7:56 p.m.: After puttering back and forth for 30 minutes, we're finally on a service elevator to get up to the press box. The elevator attendant says she just saw Fergie. She says she was "short and skinny." That's slightly different than how we would've described her. We probably would've gone with something like "Frumpy-faced."

8:28 p.m.: Despite being told that the elevators we were on would take us to the 8th floor (which is where the press box is), it didn't. Now we're waiting to get onto some separate elevators on the complete opposite side of the stadium. Here's a snippet of the conversation being held directly in front of us: "...That was a well thought-out plan. They didn't know who I was. It couldn't be traced back to me." This elevator ride is already more interesting than the last four.

8:35 p.m.: Fuck. Wrong elevators again. Kill me.

8:58 p.m.: Okay, seriously, Reliant Stadium Elevator Attendants, is it really so much to ask that you know which elevators can access the 8th floor and which ones can't? That seems like it'd be a pretty essential part of the job. 9:00 p.m.: In the press box. Finally.

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Shea Serrano