Each Wednesday, Rocks Off arbitrarily appoints one lucky local performer or group "Artist of the Week," bestowing upon them all the fame and grandeur such a lofty title implies. Know a band or artist that isn't awful? Email their particulars to firstname.lastname@example.org.
Things have not been well. They just haven't. And whenever things don't go well, we do what all guys too old to get into fights do: listen to screeching, howling, pulsating, pounding rock music really, really, grossly, really loudly.
Hooray for the Born Again Virgins.
BAV is a completely acceptable music alternative to driving your car headfirst into oncoming traffic, particularly when the lead vocalist James Red unhinges his jaw and lets loose the full force of his rocker screech.
So we reached out to BAV to cut it up about becoming a born-again virgin, his gorilla upbringing and Justin Bieber as Kurt Cobain.
On the hop.
Rocks Off: We're a bit unsure on the process of becoming a born again virgin. Can you explain that some? Is there a maximum amount of sex that you can or can not have before trying to become a BAV?
Born Again Virgins: Waiting on that hymen to grow back while getting the occasional blowie? We're not sure.
RO: We don't know if you're aware of this, but you guys are making some real actual rock and roll. Was this your intention?
BAV: Considering that Justin Bieber is the Kurt Cobain of our generation, absolutely not. Jokes aside, we're here to have fun and play the kind of music that excites us and gets the people dancing. If that's what you consider rock and roll, then rock on.
RO: We think it's kind of confusing that your singer wears glasses but doesn't wear a shirt. It's like he's being careful and reckless at the same time. He's all about proper vision, but doesn't give a shit about skin cancer. It's an interesting dichotomy, like wearing a muscle shirt with a turtleneck or something.
BAV: James is a dichotomy in itself, an anomaly. We believe he was born into a wolf pack and raised by gorillas.
RO: Given the heartiness of your music, we trust your live shows are excellent. Tell everyone what they can expect at your Oct. 9 show at Groundhall.
BAV: We play hard, fast, sweaty, loud, SHIRTLESS and dirty rock and roll; basically a dance party without the candy.
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RO: Anything else you want to make sure gets mentioned? Now's the time to do it.
BAV: We are currently writing for our EP, which will be out spring 2011. Until then here are some random BAV facts:
- Aaron is the shortest thug we know. The gov'nah
- Bryan goes good with ranch dressing and pickles.
- Adria has the biggest dick in the band.
Hear Born Again Virgins online at myspace.com/bornagainvirginstx.