Sharon Pillack, A Fisherman's Dream (Jak Se Mate Records, 1983)

So there I was, just walking down the edge of the creek from my favorite fishing hole. The largemouth weren't biting and my pole seemed limp in my hands. I rounded the bend, and there she was: a bleached-blonde beauty with bobbers and a tackle box a working man like me could only dream about.

She handled her rod like a pro, and caught my heart hook, line and sinker. Mind you, it was all a bit blurry; I'd already polished off half of my twelver of Blatz. I pulled up my Igloo and sat down next to her.

"So, baby, what's a moderately attractive lady like you doing in a polluted construction runoff sluice like this?" She was frank. "Well, I mean besides fishing," I replied. She still didn't bite. A girl like this just needs the right bait.

I stood up and moved closer. I grabbed my rod. "Ever tried fly fishing?" She kicked me in the balls. I fell over, knocking the cooler in the drink. I watched helplessly as the new love of my life walked away up the bank, and my old standby floated six abreast down the creek. And that's how my fisherman's dream turned into a fisherman's nightmare.

Where Are They Now?

Sharon Pillack seems to be alive and well and still living in Agua Dulce, a tiny spot on the map between Alice and Corpus Christi. This record was released on the Jak Se Mate label, whose address is listed on Oak Forest's Del Norte Street. - Nick DiFonzo