Drenched in Blog: Bindi Irwin, Rapper

So I’m thinking about starting another blog dedicated to people who should not rap. With the recent rash of

rhyming math teachers

comes the

news

that Bindi Irwin has entered the rap game.

Yes, Bindi Irwin, the late Steve “Crocodile Hunter” Irwin’s daughter.

Ever since Bindi’s dad’s unfortunate encounter with a surly stingray, the poor little rich girl has been trotted out as something of a successor to her father’s legacy with her TV show, chat-show appearances and other promo work. Now she’s become a sort of a pop star in Australia, releasing albums full of songs about terrorizing animals and grabbing their reproductive business for the cameras. The music sounds like some sort of oddball Hannah Montana/Peaches hybrid.

Maybe Jack Hanna’s grandkids can start a stepping crew to dance behind her? Getting crunk with crocs? Beefin’ with geeses? I don’t know, I’m white. Lay off. – Craig Hlavaty

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