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Keep Houston Press Free
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Drenched in Blog: Kisslature

Man, if life isn’t already FUBAR these days. You got a never-ending war going on, people kidnapping four-year olds, O.J Simpson going to jail and NOT staying, smoking bans…

Leave it to Kiss’ Gene Simmons to lead us further down the evolutionary ladder. See, instead of sticking with reuniting his band every few years, covering the Prodigy, and having sex with Shannon Tweed, dude wants to be a science-fiction writer. And we all know how well he does with sci-fi. Anyone ever see that weird-ass movie KISS Meets the Phantom of the Park?

Simmons’ graphic novel, Zipper, is about a soldier from outer space. It follows the alien as he tries to become an individual while looking oddly like sperm. Simmons claims that the story is about his challenges growing up an immigrant from Israel. (Remember, his real – and somewhat awesome – name is Chaim Witz.) My opinion is that this is just another clever ploy to separate Kiss fans from their money. These are the same people who will buy laxatives with the band’s logo on the bottle. Hell, I guess I would too. – Craig Hlavaty

Here’s that “Firestarter” video, because boobs and cars rule. As does white mink...

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