Houston’s 10 Best Bars to Drink Away the Election

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The 2016 Presidential Election is today; it’s likely you already knew this. For some, Election Day is a chance to sit down with friends and discuss politics as the results roll in. Others choose to stay home and avoid the discourse. Some, particularly during this hot mess of an election season, will choose to hunker down at a bar and either drink away their sorrows or celebrate with a few pints or spirits. Houston doesn’t lack for bars to do just that; these are our choices for the best ones in which to drink away Election Day. Looking for something a bit more political? The Houston Press has you covered there as well. (This list is in alphabetical order.)

This one is likely to lean Democratic, but it will also favor those who like beer in large quantities. There are 270 electoral votes necessary to win the Presidency, so Axelrad is going to give out 270 “good a$$ beers.” It’s pretty simple. Everyone who attends the event receives a drink ticket. As the results of each state are announced, Axelrad will give out as many beers as that state has electoral votes (example: When Texas is announced, 38 beers will be handed out). That kind of political approach likely appeals to both parties. (1517 Alabama, axelradbeergarden.com)

Whether Captain Foxheart’s is hosting any kind of election-related function is inconsequential; with “bad news” in the title, this is the type of bar for those whose candidate came up short, or for those who have simply had it with election coverage entirely. The cocktails will go down smooth at this quintessential upscale dive, no matter your affiliation. (308 Main, twitter.com/badnewsbar)

Again, election coverage is secondary at this Midtown establishment. Rather,  those who are done with election season (good riddance!) can check out the best steak night in the city. Chow down on a 16-ounce hand-cut rib eye, cooked slowly over the coals and served up with a loaded baked potato. And while you may be questioning where our country is at with the state of politics today, it’s your turn to answer the questions at 7:30 p.m., when Front Porch's trivia starts. (217 Gray, frontporchpub.com)

For those who checked out on election season a while back, what better place to finish it out than a joint called the Hideaway? Forget politics and get down with Hideaway’s weekly Tuesday Big Ass Blues Jam, hosted by Rick Lee and the Night Owls; the party starts at 9:30 and runs past 1 a.m. There’s no cover, and steaks are fired up on the grill. Plus, free Wi-Fi for those interested in monitoring election results online. (3122 Dunvale, hideawayondunvale.com)

Idiocracy is a Mike Judge film that comically imagines America as some sort of political/pop-culture wasteland. It was intended to be a spoof of sorts; if only Judge knew his comedy would become all too real in 2016. In honor of election season, Ladybird’s is gonna cue up Idiocracy on the patio's big screen at 8 p.m., for those who prefer their politics parodied. Plus, Taco Tuesday! (5519 Allen, ladybirdsbar.com)

Local community-radio station KPFT is hosting an election watch party. More important, as it often does at this Houston institution, the real draw is live music. Steve Straker and his brand of Americana headline the event, which gets going early in the evening. Get down on some quality local Tex-Mex to help get over the Tuesday blues. (1403 Nance, lastconcert.com)

This Washington bar is giving the people a God Help Us! Party, which basically sums up many people’s thoughts on this entire election. Specialty drinks include the Tequila Wall, Deleted Email Shot and You’re Fired(ball) Shot – you see where they’re going with this. Dress up as your favorite candidate and watch election coverage on more than 25 television screens. (5110 Washington, lincolnbarhouston.com)

Lone Star Saloon is a Houston landmark, a dive bar you can visit to sort of lie low and get away from life for a while. What better day to take a vacation from life than on Election Day? So grab a bottle of Lone Star, check out some of the interesting folks who wander in and enjoy some conversation that doesn’t revolve around deleted emails and sexual-assault scandals. (1900 Travis, 713-757-1616)

You know how a lot of celebrities have said they’re moving to Canada if Donald Trump wins the presidency? Hell, maybe you’ll find a couple of 'em at this little piece of Canada. NHL games will be on TV, the Molson will be cold and the weekly Texas Hold ‘Em tournament will be alive and kicking. (514 Elgin, themapleleafpub.com)

“I Survived Election Day 2016” — Saint Arnold, you know us too well. The godfather of Houston-area breweries is hosting an all-day event billed as an “Election Day safe haven.” The brewery is not for those looking to monitor election coverage, as the Saint Arnold beer hall will be television-free. Come in with an “I Voted” sticker and get your first pint of beer for $1. Commemorative stickers will be handed out to those folks fortunate enough to survive the day. (2000 Lyons, saintarnold.com)

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