Welcome to Ask Willie D, Rocks Off's advice column where the Geto Boys MC answers reader questions about matters, in his own words, "funny, serious or unpredictable." Something on your mind? Ask Willie D!
I NEED TO KNOW HOW TO ASK A GIRL TO PROM
Dear Willie D:
There's this girl at my high school who I really like, and I was thinking about asking her to my prom. I don't think she has a boyfriend; at least I have never seen her with a guy. We have three classes together so we speak to each other, but we never really talk.
She is one of the prettiest girls at my school, so I'm a little intimidated by her. Please, please, please tell me what to say to get her to be my prom date.
So you want to prom-pose, huh? It depends on how big or small you want to go. If you want to go small simply say, "Hey, you want to go to prom with me?" If you want to go big you could do a scavenger hunt where you leave a series of notes on her desk or taped to her locker that leads to you. To make sure she's the slightest bit interested and you don't waste your time, I would suggest you leave the first note on her desk with something she knows belongs to you -- like a book with your name written on the inside of the front cover.
That would force her to communicate with you, and allow you to gauge her interest. You could say something original, or use one of those fortune-cookie quotes like: "Elegant surroundings will soon be yours." If she plays along past the first note your chances will dramatically increase. About five notes should be enough. The fourth note could say something like: "Go to [insert your name] to retrieve your final message."
At that point you could present her with a note asking her to be your prom date, and a copy of a restaurant reservation confirmation for two, and/or flowers. Asking a girl you're not dating to prom is seldom an easy thing to do, even for the coolest guys at school. Just don't wait until the last minute because besides risking her to another guy's invite, if she says no you won't have time to pursue a second choice.
I WANT TO NAME MY SON AFTER YOU
Dear Willie D:
I am a 24-year-old white girl from Omaha, Nebraska and I think I'm your biggest fan. Correction: I am your biggest fan. I have followed your career ever since my dad brought me to your concert with the Geto Boys at The Waiting Room last October. I have researched all of your music, and have read many interviews of yours. I love your passion and respect your viewpoints on life so much that I want to name my firstborn son after you. What do you think about that, Mr. Clean Up Man? By the way, I'm not a Stan.
I didn't name my own son after me because I thought my name sounded old-fashioned. But lately I've been warming up to it and would consider it an honor for your son to carry my namesake -- as long as this is not a trick to collect child support from me.
More Ask Willie D on the next page.
MY WIFE'S SPENDING HABITS ARE HURTING OUR MARRIAGE
Dear Willie D:
My wife spends money like it grows in our backyard garden. I don't understand her compulsive behavior because she is an educated woman and both of her parents are good savers. She has countless clothing items, and shoes that still have the tags on them, and have never been worn. She told me that shopping relieves her stress. That's all fine and dandy, but her shopping causes me stress.
Our combined income is over $170,000 annually, but we have very little savings, and no investments. I keep telling her that nothing is guaranteed. With the way the economy is today we could lose our jobs tomorrow. Besides, we are getting older and should be focusing on saving money, not spending it.
We don't have any kids, but both of us want to retire at 50, which is only ten years away for her and 12 for me. How do I get her to see what she's doing is hurting our future?
Sit your wife down and explain to her that as a team you guys need to develop a financial game plan so you don't end up old and destitute. Since you're the saver, you should be in charge of the budget. She's the spender so agree that she will plan the vacations, birthday celebrations, and entertainment. If you strategize together, you and your wife will recognize that both of you share a joint responsibility in the relationship, thereby eliminating the urge to play the blame game.
Whether the crisis you're facing in your relationship is emotional, health-related, or financial, you should do everything in your power to work through it for better or worse, like you said you would.
STRESSFUL WORK ENVIRONMENT
Dear Willie D:
I work for a collection agency in a room with 20 people. Most of them love having office parties. An office party is when a collector calls a person's place of employment and uses abusive tactics to shame someone into paying a debt. The worst kind is when they flat-out tell a coworker that a debtor is not taking care of his or her responsibilities by avoiding paying their debt.
They also have block parties, which are similar to office parties, but instead of calling your boss or your coworkers to tell your business, they call your neighbors. It makes me sick to my stomach to hear them on the phone berating debtors while they exchange high-fives and joke about their misery. Even though I don't participate in that type of unethical behavior, I still feel guilty because it makes people in my profession look bad.
Without being mean to people, I earn a decent living so I don't want to quit my job. But the stress from the negativity is getting to me. My supervisor doesn't encourage the behavior, but she is aware of what goes on. How can I address this issue without jeopardizing my job?
By your supervisor not discouraging your coworkers' unethical behavior, she is encouraging it. If it bothers you that much, just tell her how you feel. But I can tell you right now the only thing it will change is how your supervisor looks at you: as a non-team player.
You should keep your mouth shut, continue to do your job well, and tell your boss how much you appreciate the opportunity to work for her at such a great company. Then when you find a better gig, stab her in the back and post a video on World Star Hip Hop of her inbred employees in action.
PREVIOUSLY ON ASK WILLIE D
Ask Willie D anything at askwillied.com, and come back next Thursday for more of his best answers.
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