Texas Music

Lone Star Scorecard: All Robert Earl Keen Edition

There are a lot of songs about Texas out there, and Rocks Off wouldn't be doing our duty if we sent you off into the world without properly informing you about their veracity. That's what the Lone Star Scorecard is for, and if it keeps even one of you from making an embarrassing Texas-based faux pas at a party/wedding reception/embassy dinner, then we've done our job.

Occasionally we devote an entire edition to one artist, and this week it's Houston's own (well, sort of) Robert Earl Keen, who helps his hometown ring in the New Year at House of Blues December 28.

"Corpus Christi Bay"

We're not calling REK a liar, but we find it hard to believe a couple of guys who already had rolling a car and getting stoned along the seawall on their record could get away with illegal dumping (of his brother's ex-wife's stuff). And for heaven's sake, if you can't stay sober in Corpus, come on up to Houston... nobody drinks here.

"Gringo Honeymoon"

Maybe you could get away with illegally crossing the Rio Grande back in the Clinton era, but these days we doubt you could convince Captain Pablo to flaunt the Department of Homeland Security for a measly two dollars.

"New Life in Old Mexico"

Never mind that Eagle Pass is, strictly speaking, more west than "south of San Antone." Or that you want us to believe you took out a pistolero with just your Bowie knife, borracho or not. No, what we're having a problem with is the fact that, in spite of our assumption that the law is hot on your heels for your crimes in Carolina, you decide to grab a drink while sitting mere "moments from your freedom." Some people deserve to get caught, we guess.

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Peter Vonder Haar writes movie reviews for the Houston Press and the occasional book. The first three novels in the "Clarke & Clarke Mysteries" - Lucky Town, Point Blank, and Empty Sky - are out now.
Contact: Pete Vonder Haar