Pop Life

Prog-Rock Bassist Enters Stupid Criminal Hall Of Fame

Sometimes when Rocks Off interviews this musician or that one, we'll ask them what they do to kill time on the road. Some of them read, others take in the local sights if they have time, obviously a lot of them listen to music. The answers are usually pretty mundane, so we don't ask the question much anymore.

Then again, we've never interviewed Coheed and Cambria bassist Michael Todd. Perhaps former bassist might be more appropriate. Either way, Rocks Off is pretty sure no one has ever answered "rob a pharmacy with a 'cell-phone bomb' and take a cab back to the arena, where the cops were waiting for me."

Evidently that's what happened Sunday, when Todd decided he really, really needed some OxyContin - six bottles' worth - before C&C opened for Soundgarden at the Comcast Center in Mansfield, Mass., about halfway between Boston and Providence, R.I. What happened next is something so smack-your-head stupid even Family Guy wouldn't touch it. (Maybe.)

From Rocks Off's Village Voice Media sister blog True Crime Report:

[Todd] went to a Walgreens in Attleboro. He walked up to the pharmacy desk and showed the druggist his cell phone, where he had written a note saying he had a bomb. Then he asked for six bottles of the pain medication.

So far, so good.

But his skill as a robber went decidedly downhill when he failed to arrange for a getaway car, a rather important element of the stick-up trade. Instead, the moron hailed a cab to take him back to the arena. Witnesses, naturally, got the name of the cab company, which easily traced where the cab was headed.

By the time Todd reached the Comcast, the cops were already waiting for him.

Read the entire True Crime Report here. And if you know any bass players who love Pink Floyd, Blue Oyster Cult and The Mars Volta in more or less equal measure, tell them now's their big chance.

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Chris Gray has been Music Editor for the Houston Press since 2008. He is the proud father of a Beatles-loving toddler named Oliver.
Contact: Chris Gray