Screwston, Texas

Rap Round Table: What's The Scariest Movie You've Ever Seen?

Some rappers happen to be thoughtful, intelligent people. Each week, Rocks Off will have some of them here discussing issues relevant to their culture.

This Week's Panel: Doughbeezy, B L A C K I E, Chane, Willie D, ESG, Kyle Hubbard, Propain

Not Invited: Tom Six, director of Human Centipede and Human Centipede 2.

This Week's Prompt: I watched Human Centipede 2 because I'm stupid. What's the scariest/most unsettling movie you've ever seen? Why?

Note: Watching HC2 was, without question, the most unsettling movie-related experience of my life. If you've not seen it, don't. Quick synopsis: This little, fat, mentally retarded man becomes obsessed with a movie about a doctor who sews three people together mouth to butthole. This man decides he wants to do so as well, except he wants to use 12 people.

The guy who plays him is unbelievably adept at being awful and creepy. He never says one word throughout the movie. He does, however, masturbate using sandpaper, so I guess that's an equitable exchange.

They show him knock a guy's teeth out with a hammer, beat a literal hole into his mother's head with a crowbar, cut a few people's ACLs with scissors, rape a woman with barbed wire wrapped around his penis (after she's just eaten diarrhea, FYI). And that all happens in, like, maybe a 20-minute sequence. FML.

Doughbeezy: If I had to think off the top of my head, I'd say The Exorcist. That shit there crazy, mayne.

B L A C K I E: Irreversible. Intro is nauseating, and if the face bashing doesn't get you, the rape scene. Surprise ending is fucked.

Chane: Candyman*. He was the only horror movie killer that ever had me actually scared as a kid. It was just something about him. It seemed like he could happen in real life.

*Super solid pick. Incredibly creepy. Even now, if I'm in the restroom and someone makes a Candy Man joke, I'm still like, "STOPPLAYINGSTOPPLAYINSTOPLAYING." Total bitch mode.

Willie D: Poltergeist. The girl's head did a 360. Need I say more?

ESG: As a kid, it was The Exorcist and The Omen, when that opera sounding scary music made you feel something was about to happen.

Kyle Hubbard: The collective Star Wars prequels, mostly because of the lame-ass light it has now forced the originals to be cast in. I mean, Darth Vader has been made into the ultimate pussy. I hope that fat fuck George Lucas can sleep at night. Well, of course he can. He is rich as shit. But, c'mon, bro.

Propain: Roots.

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Shea Serrano