Rocks Off's Rodeo Concert Guide: Brad "Not Jake Gyllenhaal" Paisley

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Date: March 11 Name: Brad Paisley AKA: "Isn't That Jake Gyllenhaal?" Genre: Freemason country Best Known Song(s): "Alcohol," "She's Everything," "Ticks," "Ow, My Back" Key Demographic: Confused Brokeback Mountain fans, people who only eat the vanilla section of Neapolitan ice cream Previous HLSR Appearances: 2001, 2005, 2008-09 Houston Connections, If Any: According to Wikipedia, "Houston is a village in Renfrewshire, lying within the Gryffe Valley 6 miles (9.7 km) northwest of Paisley in the west-Central Lowlands of Scotland." That's...pretty close. If You Like This, Chances Are You'll Like: Prince of Persia, John Denver, eyebrows Odds of Wearing a Hat: 100% Because He/She's Bald? No, just sensitive. Odds of Onstage Injury: Funny you should mention that, because he ate it pretty hard at his March 6 concert in Charleston. We're betting he doesn't romp around quite so much here. Seriously Though, That's Not Jake Gyllenhaal? No

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