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Date: March 8
Name: Tim McGraw
AKA: "That Lucky Bastard"
Genre: Sports country
Best Known Song(s): "Don't Take The Girl," "Live Like You Were Dying," "Dude, Have You Checked Out my Wife?"
Key Demographic: Mets fans, arena-football aficionados, Democrats looking for a counter to Toby Keith
Previous HLSR Appearances: 1996-97, 2003, 2008
Houston Connections, If Any: Yeah. Houston loves anybody named
McGraw
If You Like This, Chances Are You'll Like: Styx's "The Best of Times," Sandra Bullock movies, one size too small T-shirts
Odds of Wearing a Hat: 100%
Because He/She's Bald? Oh yeah.
Odds of Onstage Injury: Only if he and Kenny Chesney get drunk and try to
steal another horse. We don't take too kindly to that here.
Can You Really "Live Like You Were Dying"? Maybe if you spent every day committing grand larceny, downing massive numbers of intoxicants, and fucking anything with a pulse. We're not sure that's the message McGraw was going for, however.
[Ed. Note: Shame.]