Saturday Night: One Mic Houston Anniversary At Groundhall

One Mic Houston's Two-Year Anniversary Party Groundhall January 22, 2010

11:04 p.m.: You know what's a good way to tell if you're lost downtown? If, at any point while you're driving, someone in your car says something like, "What street are we looking for? Pease? Um, I think you need to tur - Holy shit! I think I just saw a guy masturbating behind a McDonald's!"

11:13: To get you up to speed real quick: One Mic is a concert series - previously monthly, now bimonthly - put on by hasHBrown, John Dew and David Wright. Tonight is their anniversary show. There are 40 or so acts performing on two different stages.

11:17: There's something about watching hasHBrown do his boom-bap shuffle outside in the cold at night that just says hip-hop. Sometimes, it feels like he was born 18 years too late and 1,500 miles too far south.

11:17:04: Two things are wrong the above timestamp: a) Houston isn't due south of New York. But really, if you're the type of person to point out those types of things, nobody's paying attention to what you're saying anyway; and b) It's clearly a nod to the strength of New York musicianship, but it's done only as a courtesy, because New York only used to be recognized as the place where the best rap music was being made. These days, everyone who doesn't live there recognizes that, save a handful of people, it's pretty much a hip-hop shithole.

11:22: Kane is up on the inside stage right now. As active as he is in the Houston rap community, he's hardly ever caught performing. Seeing him rap live is like seeing Nessie dog-paddling around Loch Ness in broad daylight. If someone tries to snap pictures of this as proof that it actually happened, those pictures will almost certain come out all blurry and unconvincing.

11:24: The seating in here is less than stellar. Our chair looks like it very well may immediately fall apart if you actually sit on it. We shake it to make sure that it isn't already broken, which, incidentally, is the same way we make sure that babies aren't broken.*

* Ed Note: Shea is KIDDING, people. We have met his two children, who are 100 percent unshaken.

11:25: "I don't like MILFs. I don't give a mother fuck"... "You good to you, I'm good to them. I stay in front, ahead, like a brim." Does anybody else remember Kane's The Curfew having this many quotable lines?

11:33: During a lull in the action, John Dew, who is one of the guys emceeing tonight, asks the crowd, "Anybody out there wanna come up and sp--." Before he can finish, a guy near the front of the shoots his hand up and then makes his way up there before anyone else can chime in. Everyone in here is a rapper, it seems.

11:33:10: Ha. Turns out the eager sir is none other than Doughbeezy, last week's Artist of the Week. The best part: He introduces himself as exactly that. Resident kingmakers, the Artist of the Week column has become.

11:36: Young Sensation just hopped up on stage for an impromptu performance as well. Cool, cool.

11:38: In case you weren't aware of this, anytime you hear a rapper who is freestyling say "Maaaaan, hold up" and then laugh as a way to end his performance, that's basically the same as him saying, "Welp, I just ran out of shit to say. Bye."

KEEP THE HOUSTON PRESS FREE... Since we started the Houston Press, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Houston, and we'd like to keep it that way. With local media under siege, it's more important than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" program, allowing us to keep offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food and culture with no paywalls.
Shea Serrano