Some Happy Working Songs for the One Day You're Not Working

Work sucks holy balls. We have had some shitty jobs and some awfully fun jobs in our time. There was the summer we spent picking up used tampons and perpetually washing mirrors at a small health club. Or the three years we spent working in the dairy department at Kroger, doing whippets off ReddiWip canisters eight hours a day. We learned early on just what Labor Day is all about, even if our jobs at the time predicated that we actually had to work on said holiday. The origins behind the enacting of Labor Day have gotten kind of muddled through history. The first recorded labor holiday was in celebrated in September 5, 1882. The holiday officially put on the books 12 years later under President Grover Cleveland as a way to quell tensions between railway companies and the labor unions. The Pullman Strike occurred in the summer of 1894 and saw the U.S. government attack striking workers, killing 13 and doing copious amounts of damage throughout the city of Pullman, Illinois. In the aftermath, President Cleveland enacted the holiday as a sort of catch-all to commemorate the fallen strikers and also give Americans another day off. Strangely enough, most people outside of white-collar positions probably didn't get the day. So in essence the holiday was originally for folks who pretty had the day off every day anyhow. Today Labor Day informally marks the end of the summer season for most folks, and it also means that college and pro football are starting up again. For Houston Astros fans it is the part of the season where we start getting ready for spring training and selling our remaining tickets on Craigslist. It's always been a drinking holiday for damn sure. Plus it's a good long weekend to go on an extended illicit drug binge.

The Godfathers "Birth, School, Work, Death":

All four phases of life distilled into four harrowing minutes, played by a bunch of dudes who look like they were extras in

The Commitments


Johnny Cash, "16 Tons":

Holy shit, Johnny looked like Harvey Keitel when he grew his moustache out. Can you imagine him playing "The Wolf" in

Pulp Fiction

? Our nerd nuts would have exploded.

Loverboy, "Working For The Weekend":

Rocks Off: helping you fulfill your daily pleather and bandana quota daily.

Bachman Turner Overdrive, "Takin' Care of Business":

Well, we can now mark "rub one out to a BTO song" off our bucket list.

Poison, "Nuthin' But A Good Time":

This is best played cranked up in your car on Friday afternoon as you leave the office. You haven't lived until you have seen a Clear Lake cougar take her top off to this song at Sherlock's on a Sunday night.

Dolly Parton "9 to 5":

God we just wanna bury our face in Minnie Mouse's tits. Or Dolly's, it's really whatever.

Hal Jalapeno "Workin' In A Coal Mine":

The Devo and Lee Dorsey takes aside, this is our favorite version of the Allen Toussaint-penned ode to working long black shafts.

The Silhouettes "Get A Job":

This is Rocks Off's way of pouring out a 40 for our hard-ass homies collecting unemployment.

Rush "Working Man":

Geddy Lee sorta sucks,

but on a side note...Dropkick Murphys "10 Years Of Service":

Ah, the good ol' days at Fitzgerald's, when a Friday night meant smoking a whole pack of Beedis before jumping into a moshpit and getting kicked in the bing bong.

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