Somniloquy is the clinical term for talking in your sleep. It's certainly one of the most embarrassing medical condictions we can think of, besides cancer or something, because you are very much at the mercy of your own subconscious, that freaky little bastard in your head that makes you find women that look like your mother attractive, or gives you sex dreams about your eighth-grade English teacher.
It's also one of the most played-out and tired subjects of pop music, popping up in tracks from The Cars to early pop singer Billy Murray, of whom you would only be a fan if you are over 120 years old or really into HBO's Boardwalk Empire.
Is there a cure for sleep-talking? Yeah, you should probably drink to excess so that you enter a near-coma state where your motor functions nearly shut down. That, or get super-high and get your friends to record it. We read that in a medical journal somewhere.
Craig's Hlist first noticed the sleep-talking strain in pop music maybe a deacde ago, and every since then it has felt like nails on a chalkboard to our ears. Or thinking about that scene in The Dark Knight with the pencil in the eye socket. Or white-guy reggae.
Does Craig's Hlist talk in our sleep? We've been told that you can ask us questions in our sleep and we are very apologetic and sweet, but that's the extent of it. Because we're a bi-racial angel, we don't make rash declarations, like the time Craig's Hlist Sr., according to his wife and our mother, was heard to scream "I'm gay!" in his sleep one night. We can only imagine the dream he was having, and how amazing his outfit probably was.
We made a list of songs featuring sleep-talkers, including a few takes on a song originally written by a band called Marmalade, and then used heavily in the country realm. We weren't surprised that Christopher Cross wrote a song about sleeping, since he looks like he hibernates nine months out of the year.
If you like this story, consider signing up for our email newsletters.
SHOW ME HOW
This list also features the frank and freaky stylings of Denise LaSalle, who remains our favorite female soul singer of all time, if only for her lyrical content. She was raunchy as shit when chicks like Peaches and Nicki Minaj were still playing with Barbie dolls.