1. If you see an unattended gate, just through it. What are they gonna do, kill you? "How dare you see my shitty band for free!" (Sorry Hugh Hefner)
2. If you think that someone you see on the street is famous, theres a 50/50 chance they are. Everyone looks like someone, but they may just be nobody. Like the 70 Vampire Weekend members running around.
3. Free booze is not always good booze. Just ask my cognitive senses this morning at 6 as I tried to plug my digital camera into the iPod dock in the hotel.
4. Buying cigarettes is for choads. Just let the Camel guys give you a few packs. Use an alias and your grandma's home phone number.
4. Beards are so back in. They are this year's fashion mullet.
5. Eight-foot squirrels are fabulous and saucy dancers. (See picture below.)
6. If you think that electrical cord looks important, don't touch it. (Sorry, Justice.)
7. For the next year I plan on cleaning all my bosses houses each and every week so I can get a fancy badge in 2009. (Not really, but you get the idea. Wink Wink)
Keep the Houston Press Free... Since we started the Houston Press, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Houston, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Houston with no paywalls.