Rocks Off gets at least 6,000 emails a week.

Aight, it's more like 30 a day, I guess, more if it's SXSW season or the holidays, or if my co-workers get into a rousing conversation about chicks in our one of nightlife slideshows.

Out of all those emails, we may gleefully respond to a dozen, and delete most after just reading the header. The ones we respond to are mostly about new albums, toys, interview opportunities, or advance screenings.

And yes, a lot of PR folks send us invitations to shows thousands of miles away , or write us and breathlessly tell us about "national tours" with only seven dates -- Chicago, NYC, Los Angeles, Seattle, San Francisco, Duluth, and Denver -- that we should really write about. It's cool, we get that the PR world is hella crazy.

But some of the subject headings we get stop us in our tracks, and we have to forward them to our fellow journalist friends out of sheer hilarity. Sometimes we end sending each other the same ones.

I got a MONO tattoo in college, and now I'm working their tour

Yeah well, I got a Rolling Stones tattoo in college and that won't get me free tickets to any of their shows in 2013, now will it?

Article: Young Pop Star Gives Advice

"Blog: Perturbed Rock Writer Bounces Rent Check"

Your Karaoke Houston Digest

I ain't gonna hate on you Friday- and Saturday-night superstars. Do your thing, guys.

Death Metal & a porn star

Sold and sold and sold forever.

The Ultimate Doo-Wop Show Comes to Stafford Centre

You should see me. I just disappeared like Wile E. Coyote in those old cartoons and I am lying down typing this in front of the Stafford Centre in a tent.

NIDINGR: Greatest Of Deceivers Details Revealed

If you look at this sentence really quick....nevermind.

Moscow's "Michael Buble" heads to the Big Apple to launch CD -- announces upcoming concert with Jennifer Lopez

At least Canada and the United States don't need to suffer alone, and you would think there would be a Russian Jennifer Lopez by now.

Cheaper does not exist anywhere

What an existential brain teaser. Does not exist anywhere. Does not exist, anywhere. Cheaper does not exist, nor is it anywhere.

ONE DIRECTION "LIVE WHILE WE'RE YOUNG" PREMIERES TODAY -- UNAUTHORIZED LEAK OF MUSIC VIDEO BRINGS FORWARD PREMIERE OF BRAND NEW SINGLE "LIVE WHILE WE'RE YOUNG"

ALL CAPS WITHOUT SPACES