Welcome back to Turning the Screw, Rocks Off's weekly rap post. It probably won't rhyme, at least most of the time. E-mail tips to firstname.lastname@example.org. Thanks, homies.
Single of the Week: "Hoes," Balls Deep
Wire To Wire
Bun B will release the final UGK album, 4 Life, this March. We have mixed feelings about this one. We mean, we're super happy for the new album and all, but damn, final? Totally sucks.
DMX is in jail again. We're all out of jokes about this. Perhaps we can interest you in this haiku instead:
DMX is jailed.
You're not surprised by that, right?
Cause that'd make you dumb.
(Count it if you want - five, seven, five - it's correct.)
Did you see MC Hammer during the Super Bowl? Sad, right?
Voletta Wallace, in response to Lil Kim's repeated verbal assaults on the Notorious Biggie Smalls biopic, called her a "white woman trapped in a black woman's body."
Denying rumors that Koch Records changed its name due to massive financial losses, general manager Alan Grunblatt said via press release: "We are looking at the best year in our history. We are just changing our name to E1 and will continue to change the game."
He then added, "On an unrelated note, do any of you know how to file for a bailout?"
"Playing With Fire," arguably the most poignant track on Lil' Wayne's barely discussed Tha Carter III, has been pulled from iTunes in hopes of avoiding a copyright suit from the Rolling Stones.
We downloaded a charming little mixtape this weekend from a fellow by the name of Theophilus London. It's pretty dope. Grab it here.
There's a Run-DMC movie on the horizon. We're crossing our fingers that Vanessa and Angela play some kind of role in it.
Soulja Boy is talking about an alleged robbery that occurred while he was at home. Reading his explanation we can't help but think he's, to put it politely, full of shit.
Flavor Flav to host a horror-humor show on BET entitled Nite Tales. That joke pretty much writes itself.
That copyright suit against Lil' Jon has been dismissed. When asked how he felt upon hearing the ruling, Lil Jon responded, "OOKKKKKAAAYYYYYY!" (Sorry.)
Houston Rap Video of the Week
Because you either missed it or forgot about it.
UGK, "Wood Grain Wheel"
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