Welcome back to Turning the Screw, Rocks Off's weekly rap post. It probably won't rhyme, at least most of the time. E-mail tips to firstname.lastname@example.org. Thanks, homies.
Single of the Week: Chamillionaire, "Good Morning"
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Despite what you initially want to think about Cham's new single "Good Morning," it is very cool. We know people are going to try and hate on it like, "This sucks. Pimp C sampled 'Free Fallin'' like ten years ago." To which we'll reply, "Actually, it was three years ago, and this is a completely different song. There is no play on the free falling tagline, it's way more melodic and, production-wise, way more airy."
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But on the cool, Houston rappers, there are more rock songs out there. Imagine Cham over "Love Gun" by KISS. Or maybe Bob Seger's "Night Moves." Oh man, he would destroy "Night Moves."
How much money do you suspect Kid Cudi will lose now that his album has officially been leaked? Probably not near as much as Jay-Z will, we imagine. We've got two jokes we wanted to use re: Mike Epps hosting the BET Music Awards but weren't certain which one to go with. Here are both:
1. Mike Epps is going to host the BET Music Awards. Umm, because he has so much experience with music? Remember that scene in The Wedding Singer where Adam Sandler is interviewing to be a banker and the guy asks him about his experience with money and Sandler says, "Well, I like it." That's probably exactly how Epps's interview went. 2. Mike Epps is going to host the BET Music Awards. Why would you ever do that? That's like signing yourself up to be the conductor of a train that you know is going to crash for three straight hours.
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The Kanye and Soulja Boy are teaming up together. One of those is taking a big step forward, the other a big step back. We'll let you decide which is which. Why Slate.com gotta be hatin' on Roxanne Shante? VH1 is going to honor Def Jam? Didn't they do that already? What are we thinking of? Anybody else take the time to listen to former Destiny's Child member LeToya Luckett's new album, Lady Love? It's actually kinda fun. Give it a whirl. She seems like a nice person. Are we to believe "House of Flying Daggers" is really the best single from Raekwon's new album? Uh-oh. What's the over/under on the amount of times a Harvard student said "Hey, what's M.C. Hammer doing here?" this past week? T.I., Lil Wayne and 50 are all getting Behind the Music-y. Looking forward to watching all three of those. Jermaine Dupri and DJ Greg Street ended their feud. That's great, because we were really getting tired of not giving a shit about it. How about Chris Brown pulling the "I don't remember" card when asked about previous physical abuse he laid to Rihanna's face? That doesn't seem like something you should be able to use that excuse for. Forgetting where you ate last Tuesday is understandable. Forgetting the time you beat up a pop star is not. It turns out prescription drugs were what did DJ AM in. Somewhere another doctor besides Conrad Murray is crapping in his pants. Houston Rap Video of the Week Because you either missed it or forgot about it. "Wood Grain Wheel," Slim Thug