The hip-hop world is a less than sensible place - lots of times, you're even required to clarify when bad means bad and when bad means good - so once a week we're going to get with a rapper and ask them to explain things. Have something you always wanted to ask a rapper? Email it to firstname.lastname@example.org.
Note: This week's subject/rapper combination didn't come together out of thin air as some of the other one's have. We actively searched out A.D.D. after we listened to his "E. Honda Freestyle" several times and then pulled his video-game card. He passed. Like a motherfucker.
This Week's Rapper: A.D.D.
This Week's Subject(s): Video Game Characters Sympathetic to the Struggle of Rappers
Ask A Rapper: Okay, sir. You're a video-game man. Your mettle has been tested. Let's do this: Can you identify the ten video game characters that best align themselves with rappers? Go ahead and give a brief description for each as well. And go...
10. Tomba, Tomba: Without question, when I wake up in the morning I'm definitely Tomba. My hair be all over the place man and I just continue throughout my day with it like that. I don't really concern myself with that. I just wake up wash, give it a little hand rub and go throughout my day trying to take back my land from the Koma Pigs.
9. Ed Boon, Mortal Kombat II: I have a lot of random moments on stage. I try and limit them but they always seem to happen during the most awkward of times. Kinda like Ed Boon. I know technically he's not a character, but he's in the Mortal Kombat games. He's the guy that just randomly jumps out and yells "Whoopsie!" whenever something big happens; like an uppercut or you get a 8 hit combo.
8. Sonic, Sonic The Hedgehog II: No, not on any Charles Hamilton Sonic-is-god type shit. More like "I like to take my time when making songs just to make sure everything is great." I know I'm not the only one that used to go back through the whole level just to make sure I got every ring and box possible.
7. Zelda, Ocarina of Time: Zelda is also I character I would compare myself to, and yes, I know she's a girl. I like Zelda because she transformed into Sheik. Play with Zelda on Super Smash Bros. and you could be whoopin' her ass, but as soon as she turns into Sheik it's like 10x harder to stop.
6. Sammus, Metroid Prime/Super Smash Bros.
5. E. Honda, Street Fighter II: I named a freestyle after this guy. If video games had feelings I bet E. Honda would be pissed. No one ever wants to fuck with him because they think he sucks. That is until he moves his hand about 80 times in 3 seconds. That's just how the rap game is. People don't want to fuck with you until you shake about 80 peoples' hands that they know.
4. Sara, Kingdom Hearts: I think I'm relatable to Sara the most when it comes to rap. Sara is on a quest to find himself and his friends. If it's two things you learn quick in rap, it's that you don't know who your real friends are, and you tend to do a lot of soul searching.
3. Snake, Metal Gear Solid: In this music business it's not always good to be out and seen. Sometimes you have to do things in secret so that people won't know your every move; you don't end up being predictable. Metal Gear Solid's gameplay is built around infiltrating and moving in silence.
2. Yoshi, Super Mario World: Every rapper that's doing shit right will be Yoshi at some point in their career. Yoshi is a person you network through. Just like Mario needs Yoshi to get to certain parts in Super Mario World -i.e. Star World-- rappers need people to get them places they couldn't normally get themselves. I've been Yoshi for a couple people, actually.
1. Megaman, Megaman Zero: Megaman should be a reference for any rapper that uses weed or alcohol. It's like our battle chips. Though rappers don't like to admit, we do indeed have writers block sometimes and need a little something to jump start our brain to flow more smoothly. I equip a battle chip and the thoughts start pouring in.
Send all of your video game-related questions to A.D.D. on Twitter at @theaspiringadd.
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