Willie Nelson's Heir Apparent? It's Tha D-O-Double-G, Ya See

Remember in the The Santa Clause, when the real Santa dies and Tim Allen's character has to assume his role out through the miracle of Hollywood plotting? Rocks Off imagines that once Willie Nelson shuffles off this mortal coil - assuming the Red Headed Stranger isn't immortal; honestly, we're not sure he isn't at this point - and joins the rest of the Highwaymen in the sky, wherever Snoop Dogg is, he will immediately start growing a paunch around the middle and a tiny beard will begin growing on his face. He may even inherit Trigger if Willie isn't buried with the guitar.

The similarities between the two artists are actually legion. Both have gladly taken the role of marijuana's ambassador to the rest of the world. Nobody else with their celebrity stature has done more for the public view of pot. Willie and Snoop have both helped make marijuana look fun, not that it needed any help.

The sweet leaf doesn't need anything else to advertise its awesomeness, other than the trademark smell and glassy-eyed grin of its users. At least with pot you are usually home, sedentary or carless when you use it, meaning you won't be getting behind the wheel. Plus the mere thought of driving stoned is enough to make a smoker cringe with terror. You wouldn't stop laughing at what the other cars around you looked like if they had "people" faces.

Snoop and Willie have crossed paths many times, from Snoop's Twitter admission last November that the "only person that every smoked me out is willie mothafuckn nelson!!! straight O.G." If it's on Twitter it has to be true, and those words coming from Snoop are strong. Just looking at the container that Snoop's pot comes in is supposed to obliterate you, so for the rapper to claim that the Red-Headed Stranger's reefer destroyed him is pretty epic.

Can you imagine walking into that bus or backstage while that was going down? It would be like walking into a gas chamber made of pillows, smiles and hugs. Then there was the song they collaborated on, "My Medicine," that saw Snoop hanging out on the country side of the tracks with Willie and Everlast. The track came from 2008's Ego Trippin', with Snoop shouting out Johnny Cash as a real American gangster. Willie even had Snoop help him out with "Superman" live a few times, but their teaming didn't make it on an album (yet).

Fast forward to some packed venue in the far, far future one Houston Friday night. A little old man with long black dreads, blue bandana (Crip colors, natch) surrounding his head, makes his way out of a smoky backstage room and shuffles to the front of a packed house of screaming fans. He throws the bandana to the first honey he sees in the front row while he belts out his set opener "Gin And Juice."

He will also close his set with "Gin And Juice" by the way, per tradition. In between he will perform all his hits, from "Doggy Dogg World" all the way to "Drop It Like It's Hot," but the folks in the crowd hit the restroom when he tries to play newer material. Some local blogger will write a biting screed against the disrespectful throng who wouldn't stop taking pictures of Snoop with the newly implanted cameras in their fingertips.

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Craig Hlavaty
Contact: Craig Hlavaty