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15-Minute Warning: Houston Lawyer Gets Miley Cyrus For His Christmas Party

OMG!! Guess who’s going to be at Houston lawyer Mark Lanier’s Christmas party this year – Miley Cyrus! When we heard that, we were like, 2G2BT!!

Lanier’s parties, which include thousands of guests and which take place on his 25-acre ranch northwest of Houston (well, at least we’re told that’s where they take place; Hair Balls has never been invited) are always a spectacle, but previous years’ entertainers smacked more of state-fair-purgatory than stadium-sellouts.

For cripe’s sake, two years ago, he invited KC & The Sunshine Band to do a little dance, make a little soup, and get down with Matlock tonight. So how does one go from has-beens to Cyrus, who broke Reliant Stadium attendance records when she performed at the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo last March?

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Well, we tried to find out from the man himself, but all anyone at Lanier’s office told us was, “Mark says ‘Not doing any PR. That’s part of the contract.’ So we are not doing any PR on this Christmas party.” (It must be in that clause of the contract which reads, Pssssst: Don’t tell anyone except for 8,000 people that Miley’s coming to Houston – pass it on!)

Fortunately, the folks at Texas Lawyer have filled in those unlucky enough to not be invited: Guests are asked to bring school supplies – or donations – to help kids in Guatemala. (Apparently, previous Lanier parties raised enough money to cure impoverished children in the U.S.)

-- Craig Malisow

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