50 Reasons Texas Is the Best State in America

Gawker has been stirring things up by putting out a list of The Worst 50 States in America, with Number One being the worst of the worst. (Amazingly, Manhattan-based Gawker picked New York to be least worst.)

We expected Texas to be Top Three material at least, but instead the Lone Star State came in at 13. (Yay!?)

The Texan ego is as big as the state, and no matter how much you point out to them that, uh, hey what about all this extremely terrible stuff, they will not listen. If you guys would just shut up about it for a while, the rest of us might like you a little more.

No can do, Gawker. Here are 50 things that make Texas great (IMPORTANT NOTE: This list contains no mention of the Dallas Cowboys. We just can't bring ourselves to do that.):

50. Port Arthur: A gritty Golden Triangle refinery town that somehow produced Janis Joplin, Jimmy Johnson, Robert Rauschenberg and UGK.

49. Schlitterbahn is the greatest waterpark in America, and it makes excellent use of its Hill Country surroundings.

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Richard Connelly
Contact: Richard Connelly