A Houston Rockets Christmas: Rating The Unlistenable

The Houston Rockets like to put out Christmas videos in which the players mangle carols, to the general merriment of all.

It's a good idea in theory. In practice? Cover your ears.

4. "Let It Snow" No one gets close to being in tune, but this is worth it if only for the bizarre way Yao Ming looks like some sci-fi square-headed 1950s robot with his Christmas cap on. Danger Will Robinson!!

3. "Jingle Bell Rock" We're not Rockets fanatics, so we don't recognize the sixth guy in, who ominously intones some dark words that sound like "Fuck `em" but are more likely just a semi-strangled plea to get out of here.

2. "12 Days of Christmas"

We could take only very, very little of this, but did manage to last long enough to learnthat Tracy McGrady made it through his part without blogging about how he wasn't going to make it the rest of the way.

1. "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" Dude in the Nike Adidas sweattop (little help?) might have some pipes; it's hard to tell. Luis Scola just wishes he were back home.

So how do you rank these? Let us know.

To be fair, there's not much to work with here. Don't believe us? Try -- just try -- to listen to Shane Battier sing "Let's Get it On."

We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. To find out more, visit our cookies policy and our privacy policy.


All-access pass to the top stories, events and offers around town.

  • Top Stories


All-access pass to top stories, events and offers around town.

Sign Up >

No Thanks!

Remind Me Later >