...And They Both Fetishize Torture

Here are the words that every Astros fan wants to hear in the bottom of the 8th inning with the Astros down 4-0: “Due up in the top of the 9th for the Astros are Brad Ausmus, Adam Everett, and Brad Lidge.”

Boy, doesn’t that inspire confidence?

But I’ve got to confess: I had so much confidence in the Astros last night that I missed the first five innings of the game because I was watching the season finales of 24 and Heroes. What can I say, I needed some excitement.

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Now, I also happen to think that the Astros and 24 have much in common. They’re both relying on an old formula that just doesn’t seem to be producing anymore.

The Astros lost last night 4-0. Noah Lowry, who got the complete game loss for the Giants last week, got the victory. Chris Sampson, who pitched a good game with six innings while giving up only one earned run, got the loss for the Astros.

I just don’t have much to say about the Astros anymore. The team’s just not very good. Just like I told you before the season started. Morgan Ensberg’s been consigned to the bench. And Phil Garner even moved Adam Everett down to the eight spot in the order, though he somehow kept Craig Biggio leading off.

But I’m done with those gripes. What does it matter?

I could say that the Astros were shut down by a great pitching performance. But really, do the Astros really need a great pitching performance to get shut down? Hell, nobody would call the Texas Rangers staff great, or even good, and they shut down the ‘Stros in two of three games over the weekend.

Last night was the second time this season the Astros were shut out. And the record dropped down to 21-23.

Roy Oswalt takes the mound for the Astros tonight, where, like last week, he’ll be facing Giants rookie Tim Lincecum. The odds aren’t good for a victory by the Good Guys. – John Royal

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